Notices by Mx Amber Alex (she/it) (amberage@eldritch.cafe)

This just occured to me as I unpacked the chili cheese nuggets I'm gonna have for breakfast.

These things come in a cardboard box, and then in a separate plastic wrapper inside. I guess it makes sense, you don't want freezer burn on your food, but it's still plastic trash for each box of these.

Manufacturers should be mandated to put reusable plastic bags in these (i.e. ziploc). They should be required to take them back and re-use them. There should be a deposit system on them.

Some plastic use cannot be eliminated, but where that's the case, single-use should be eliminated.

Petition to forbid stores from sending "your order has been shipped" emails until it has actually left their facility.

You printed a shipping label, sure, but DHL hasn't even picked it up yet. It's sitting in your warehouse with a barcode on it. That's not "shipped" you filthy liars.

The key words "AND MAKE IT FAST", "ABSOLUTELY NOT", and "LISTEN HERE YOU LITTLE SHIT" in this document are to be interpreted as described in RFC 2119.

SCP:

• academic or bureaucratic language
• there's a bunch that are just jokes
• not real, can't hurt you

RFC:

• academic or bureaucratic language
• there's a bunch that are just jokes
• real, can hurt you

Trans musicians of fedi, I come to you with a plea for help!

Do you have any footage of yourself playing gigs that you 1) have the rights to and 2) would permit the use of?

Can be as short as ten seconds. Big stage, small pub, camera phone or professional cam, doesn't matter, just as long as it it's from a gig and looks the part. Audio not required.

I'm working on a trans-themed music video for a cover song and I'd love to cut a little montage of performances in the last chorus.

If that call speaks to you, I'd be delighted if you replied or DM'd me!

#AskFedi #TransMusicians

@ryanc @xyla not mutually exclusive tbf

@xyla tgirl who is named grass

@annika I thought we just got rid of the thing last week??

Why is Firefox addon storage such a mess… I just want to pull some userscripts off the SSD from my dead laptop, but instead of having a folder like "tampermonkey/scripts", there are a gazillon "moz-extension++hdsjdhskjdhskjks" in the Firefox profile, each of which has an sqlite database instead of plain files.

Ugh.

I hate how much everyone romanticised the "we're all stuck in quarantine baking sourdough bread" vibe. No. No we weren't. You were, maybe. I was at work, five days, fourty hours a week.

This idea that "we" were "all" just ✨ vibing ✨ at home doing whimsical little hobbies is such a slap in the face of working class people.

@nileane what'd I miss?

@sophieschmieg actually, what you're referring to as critising Linux on Mastodon is, in fact, Mastodon/Linux criticism, or as I've taken to calling it, Mastodon plus Linux criticism. Mastodon is simply the medium, the Linux criticism is just one component of the larger social media universe.

@owl @schratze

food: $3000
rent: $0
taxes: -$10,000
utilities: $20,000
gas & kerosene: $50,000
bribing politicians: $5,000,000

please my three ex-wives and twenty estranged children are making fun of me

@JellyTBeagle where's the "I sleep with a shotgun in case my printer makes a noise" post when you need it

Every time a queer edgelord uses 4chan speak casually, I want to shake them and scream WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?

For all I care, give me a tree diagram of all posts related to the offending post, upthread and downthread, up to two degrees of separation. Scrollable/clickable further up and down the tree. Make it colour-coded so I can quickly at a glance tell apart which one of the combatants is which.

Anything, anything to elevate these moderation tools above the level of a simplex printout with two paragraphs on it.

#MastoMod

And while I'm going at it (once again 🙄): A "these moderators are also viewing this ticket" indicator, and a "another moderator has already assigned this report to themself" warning would be real goddamn neat. It happens so often that we get a report, two mods click on it at the same time, both click "assign to myself" a minute apart, and suddenly they're overwriting each other's actions.

#MastoMod

Just, please, remember we are working with digital media here. We aren't limited by what can be put to paper. This doesn't have to mimic an analogue filing system. Be creative, I beg of you, and give me moderation tools that offer a comprehensive overview, quickly, allow me to dig into the case without having to open fifty new tabs, and let me deal with everything – investigating, sanctioning, notifying the reporting user, and documenting the case – all without ever leaving the mod backend.

Please.

#MastoMod

Because, right hand to god, I tell you what – half the time it takes to deal with the average ticket is spent on pointlessly inefficient procedures that could be avoided.

Like opening all ten reported posts in new tabs, on the original instance, and hoping you can see the context there, only to find out the instance is some *oma or *key derivative that won't show you fuck shit without logging in, followed by trying to open the surrounding replies on their authors' instances to get a complete picture.

Like opening the user's profile in the mod backend in a new tab to take a look at their bio, and then pressing "refresh" to fetch the profile anew because it hasn't been refetched since it was an empty profile two minutes after account creation, because for *some* godforsaken reason, profiles and posts aren't automatically re-fetched when they're reported (please, *please* do that. *Please.*)

I'm expected to drive a big rig here, but each time I clock in, I have to run horse reins from the cockpit to the front wheels because the company forgot to give me a steering wheel.

#MastoMod

And I've been crying about this for two years or something. Look at my past posts on the subject – I've proposed a ton of improvements.

Retaining local, mod-eyes-only copies of posts that have been reported and since deleted, for documentation purposes, that's another one.

Every company in the world is required to archive receipts for a decade, but if I delete a post as a moderator, it's gone in 30 days and impossible to reconstruct the circumstances of the original ticket.

I've suggested semi-automatic moderation aids both passive and active, like automatically either silencing or just flagging for manual review every new instance the first time it's encountered.

And every time, I get a half dozen fellow mods across the 'verse agree and say, yeah, moderation tools really suck around here.

What's happened since?

The content warning field has hazard bars now. There's a mandatory, disruptive "read more" feature nobody likes. Unlisted has been renamed "quiet public" and global timelines "live feeds". We got quote posts half the userbase doesn't want.

I don't think the mod tools have changed in the entire time I've been a moderator, with one small exception:

The button that used to show posts on the original instance now shows them in the mod backend.

Providing no advantages and breaking continuity with previous behaviour for no apparent reason.

Great job, everyone. Pack it up, a job well done, clap yourself on the back.

Fuck all of this.

#MastoMod