Notices by ErosBlog Bacchus (erosblog@kinkyelephant.com), page 4

I'm so confused! There's a place in my bio to set "featured hashtags" and the docs say "Once featured, a link to the hashtag will be shown on your profile, with the date of the last time it was used in a status, as well as the total number of statuses in which it was used."

But WHERE on my profile? I can't find a profile view in the web interface that shows these links. Can somebody share a screenshot? Am I just blind?

#FeaturedHashtags

Present mood: amused by the little blonde girl on TikTok who opines with some merit that if your lady won't do #anal "because it will hurt too much" but she has #tattoos, she's just playing you -- doesn't wanna let YOU specifically up in her aft business AND doesn't wanna be straight with you about it.

Everyone is entitled to have limits and boundaries without owing explanations to anyone. But if she offers you a reason that's patently bogus? Possible red flag...

@renegadejade That post is hella awkward to look at now, but at least the slur (the status of which as such was still under some debate in 2007) is in scare quotes.

@renegadejade I'm the world's most boring white cishet male-gaze pornographer and I... just don't see how that's still possible in 2023. I mean, have they *LOOKED* at any transwomen?

That said, go back far enough and I hadn't either. Because I've been blogging about porn more or less daily for 20 years, I have the luxury of being able to point with some precision to the first time I saw/noticed/understood transwomen as women: http://www.erosblog.com/2007/09/19/definitely-about-the-sex/

@girlonthenet So well do I know the pain of harboring my own idiosyncratic SEO goals that are achievable in theory (because nobody else wants them) that I could not resist doing my part to further yours: http://www.erosblog.com/2023/09/07/popsicles-no/

@girlonthenet I will, I promise! Glad you like it. Now go and tell all the little children you know not to put beans up their noses. 😀

@girlonthenet I finally looked at the SERPs for your target phrase and found you showing at #8 for me in a guest window where Google doesn't know who I am. Unfortunately six of the other seven results are such pious condescending old-school journalistic preachy tripe that I now FULLY understand and endorse your goal. Ideally all those press orgs will also be forced to relocate onto a stinky-bilged pirate radio boat anchored in the Channel with stopped-up toilets after you have bested them.

I would never (don't say never) go on a blind date, for sundry compelling reasons, however, comma, counterpoint: https://www.girlonthenet.com/blog/blind-date-set-up-stranger/

@girlonthenet uses a comforting phrase in that post ("kisses at the speed of consent") reminding me of a disturbing meatspace convo about consent I had recently with a couple of boomer-minded relatives.

They both think it's fine to infer consent from "she went there, wearing that, and didn't say no".

He brutally mocked explicit consent, especially if it's reconfirmed as a hookup progresses, as "too much". So I blew their minds by arguing for enthusiastic consent instead. They were NOT keen.

I've been spoiled, here on Mastodon. The daily microaggressions of the bad place are so rare here, they parse as "Christ, what an asshole".

Confident argumentative wish-fulfillment predictions about what courts will do when trying to wrangle with a corpus of bad laws judges manifestly do not understand? Based on sentimental imaginings about some notional moral underpinnings thereof?

Blockety-fuckin-block.

I don't engage with tendentious legal arguments unless somebody pays me a fat hourly.

Was just reading #smutty #romance where the heroine's two-night-stand kept telling her "this is not a #love match." He even had good reasons for not wanting it to be.

I am SO TIRED of the trope where #heroine throws herself tearfully at him until he reluctantly admits that, yeah, actually, he's loopy in love too. It triggers my awkwardness phobia.

To my big relief, this time she was very good girl. Waited patiently for him to get his head straight & show up on her doorstep ready to be serious.

If you spent a dozen years building something great that depended on search engines and people being able to see your content on a certain social media platform, and then you woke up this AM to find out it was all locked inside a newly-built #WalledGarden:

Damn, ouch. Uf-da. That truly sucks. {glyph of sympathy} {facebook "caring" emoji}

This is not "I told you so", this is "what to do next, better late than never edition": http://www.erosblog.com/2013/06/11/bacchus-first-rule-of-the-internet/

See also: http://www.erosblog.com/2022/02/07/someone-elses-land/

I offer sponsored posts on ErosBlog (written in-house, by me, in a suitable editorial voice) but I do not offer guest posts (written by who the fuck knows, in various plastic and commercial voices).

I explain this in my first email to potential sponsors, and again if it seems necessary.

Too often, someone who wants a guest post will just ignore my warnings and later demand "but we will prepare the post."

Today was one of those days. It never fails to leave a bad taste in my mouth.

I know people often struggle with reading comprehension. For that, I have patience/compassion.

But "ignore my non-negotiable thing you don't like, while discussing other terms and negotiating a deal on false premises" happens too often to be a reading problem.

My theory is it's a shady negotiation tactic. They think if they can get me SO invested in the idea of their $200 invoice, I'll change my mind rather than blow up the deal.

Friends, they are wrong about that. Wrong-wrong-WRONGITY-wrong.

I saw a tweet yesterday that I'd quote-boost into this thread if our Mastodon elders allowed that sort of thing, but they don't because we must fear "the dunks".

https://kinkyelephant.com/@ainmosni@berlin.social wrote "My biggest problem with #capitalism is that it forces everyone to make earning money their primary objective. Not to provide valuable services for society."

Really feeling that right now.

Curating and promoting great #porn and #erotica is what I love, but like y'all, I'm mostly too busy paying bills.

There was a cruel window in the early 1980s during which it was possible to pass through puberty steeped in the delicious propaganda of the #SexualRevolution with its alluring promises of easy #sex and #promiscuity, only to watch in horror during your teen years as the #AIDS crisis annihilated it all and buried it in fearful and grudgingly-pair-bonded layers of latex, before you ever got your first adult taste of #pussy or #cock. Ask me how I know. #FreeLove

I should hasten to add that even acknowledging this feels churlish, petty, and self-absorbed now. For the obvious reason that this recollection of teen angst pales to insignificance when compared to the lives literally destroyed by AIDS.

Huh. Twenty minutes and two added paragraphs later, this pair of toots is a 280-word blog post.

http://www.erosblog.com/2023/02/22/free-love-bus/

I am old, and some of my meme-references have vanished from collective memory. The Dr. Katz show on Comedy Central in the late 1990s engraved one catchphrase in my brain: "That's how they getcha!" As #HyperCapitalism accelerates toward the Rapture Of The Venture Capitalists, I use it more and more. Can't find the .gif of it any more, so I made my own.

References:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dr._Katz,_Professional_Therapist

https://youtu.be/zvRXp35rqjk

#DrKatz #Meme #CatchPhrase
#ThatsHowTheyGetcha

I just saw somebody come HARD for a friend on here for using #queer in its reclaimed sense. Not my fight at all, but I checked Wikipedia to refresh my memory, and yup, this has been a bitter fight within the gay community for at least 80 years. For somebody to come slamming in red hot on the "It's a slur!" side without even acknowledging that there's an ancient good-faith dispute is bold at best, disingenuous at worst, and shitty behavior any way you look at it. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Queer#Reclamation