Notices by Danielle Foré (danirabbit@mastodon.online), page 6

Yo pretty privilege is kinda sick ngl. I just got free carne asada marinade

@pawsplay the political center is to the left of democrats. Democrats are center right.

“I think it’s great that Kamala would consider having a Republican in her cabinet so that she gets both sides”.

The side that wants people with uteruses to die in the ER? The side that doesn’t want to feed school kids? The side that wants to destroy the environment even faster? The side that wants to genocide trans people. The side that wants women to be property again? That side? You really want someone who is okay with being part of that side in a position of power?

@killyourfm oooo what a cute boot splash!

I’ve been trying to figure out what my theme is for 2023 and I think I got it. 2023’s theme is, “Step 1: Be Attractive”.

2022’s theme was self love and I found that and it’s awesome. I made so much progress on transitioning and my mental and physical health and I started a lot of new things. This year I want to build on working towards my idealized self with three big ideas:

* Have more fun
* Explore my style
* Get in the best shape of my life

# Have More Fun

I spent a lot of last year battling dysphoria, especially facial hair dysphoria. I stopped going out and doing a lot of things I enjoyed. This year I want to make more space for my hobbies and remind myself to have more fun.

# Explore My Style

Kind of recycling this from last year, but this feels started not finished. I want to get outside of my comfort zone, do things I’m not sure I could pull off, and things I always wished I could

We’re more than halfway through the year and I wanted to check on my yearly theme! I feel like I’ve made a lot of progress in some areas, stalled out in other areas, and found new things that I am working on. One of the things I did early on was to expand a bit on my vision for my ideal life, the things I’m struggling with and some smaller more specific ideas about how to fulfill my theme. Specifically I was really pre-occupied with bottom dysphoria, voice training struggles, and relationships

Speaking of, if any other Apple Fitness+ users want to join in, I’m doing the 30 day core challenge to start the year: https://fitness.apple.com/us/studio-collection/30-day-core-challenge/1596515943

# Get In The Best Shape of My Life

This has been more of a long term goal but I think I’m positioned to complete it or get very close to completing it this year. I’m only 5lbs away from my mid-20s weight from 2015. I want to stay consistently working out, eating healthy, and have a body that makes me feel confident and comfortable

While I do want to still lose weight again, I think I also discovered that by gaining weight I actually added more to the shape that I want out of my body. So I’ve been trying to reframe my idea of getting in shape to focus more on being capable, confident, feeling like I look good, etc and not be so numbers focused. I still have a lot of work to do on my relationship with food and eating and I think that’s a bigger challenge to focus on

At the beginning of the year I really wanted to focus on getting in shape, and a big part of that for me was about losing weight. I was on really good track with that but after my surgery I gained a bunch of weight back and I’ve been kind of stalled out on it. Part of this is because my estrogen levels were higher than my target, but it’s also just hard to get back into things when taking time off. But I’ve stayed consistent with exercising—my current move ring streak is 146 days!

I had my orchi earlier this year and I’m really happy to say that this has had a major impact on my bottom dysphoria and I’ve felt a lot more comfortable in my clothing. I also started bottom laser and have taken a number of steps towards vaginoplasty. At this rate, I should be able to have that next year. I’ve also started using tucking tape more often and I feel like that’s really improved my confidence. So I feel like I’ve done things to address this now and I have things to look forward to.

I also wanted to have more fun, go on more adventures, do more things for myself. And I’m not sure how I feel about this one. I have felt more confident to do things on my own, but I’m still fairly indoorsy. I wanted to play more disc golf and darts and I haven’t really done that haha. But I have been cooking way more and having a ton of fun with that. I also got my second tattoo which I love and have been making more time to play my guitar. So maybe this is more hobbies focused for me?

I have continued to refine and expand my wardrobe and I think I’m still struggling a bit with finding summer styles I like. I’m still pretty self conscious about showing my upper body too much. But I have worn a lot more tops with thin straps etc, so we’re getting there! Something I feel like I have dialed in a lot more is which makeup products I like and I’ve been wearing more makeup out. Especially discovering tinted chapstick has been lovely and concealer sponges.

I felt like last year dysphoria really made me withdrawn and I wanted to make a point this year to be more social. Unfortunately electrolysis became my new big problem and it was so bad that I was pretty depressed and even borderline suicidal at one point over it. Facial hair continues to be an enemy even 2 years into my transition. I didn’t spend any significant time playing darts or disc golf this year or even really going to trivia. I’ve been fairly disconnected socially.

I think it’s close enough to the end of the year to kind of review/wrap up and start thinking about my themes and goals for next year. So to recap my theme was “Be Attractive” and my big ideas were:

* “Have more fun”
* “Explore my style”
* “Get in the best shape of my life”

Tbh I feel like the only one of these that was accomplished in any meaningful way was “explore my style” lol. This year did not go anything like I expected. But I still accomplished a lot of other things!

Something I’ve been diving into a lot more recently is my anxiety and trying to heal my attachment wounds. Recognizing cognitive distortions, being more okay sitting in discomfort, being more mindful. This is such a work in progress but I feel like I have a better idea of where I’m at and where I need to go. My therapist told me that she’s noticed more clarity in my thinking so I’m proud of that progress. I think doing this work is a huge part of having the kinds of relationships I want in life

A huge part of that is also physical body changes especially with my orchi. Clothes are fitting a lot better, especially wearing pants higher on my waist, and I’m much more confident wearing things like leggings. It’s very hard to really explore fashion when your body doesn’t fit and seeing how much that has changed for me this year I’m really looking forward to next year and seeing how continuing fat redistribution opens up more options for me

I feel like I accomplished the most this year with exploring my style. I bought a lot of clothes, found a lot of my favorite makeup products, got way better at makeup, dyed my hair a color I’m in love with and got a haircut I really like, got two tattoos, got a lot more jewelry. This was a big year for style for me and I’m super happy about it. I feel way more confident and attractive and capable of expressing myself this year than last year

With another major surgery planned for next year, I think I just have to cut myself slack on this idea and focus on doing what I’m capable of and not hyperfocusing on trying to hang on to previous ideas or nostalgia. I definitely didn’t do what I set out to do with this idea this year, but I did do a lot of other things that I enjoyed and can be proud of. 2025 might be more of the year of socialization and for now we might need to be working more on acceptance