Notices by pino (pino@social.cologne)

@Rasp That's just something that you tell yourself since ages, good enough that you started to believe yourself. Admittedly, I even know what you meaning. The beginning is probably inconvenient and annoying. As visiting the dentist is. But in the end it's still much much better than rotting. Stop telling yourself wrong statements about what you want and what you don't want and that you want to die. And instead collect yourself, go there, give it a fair chance, and then think again next year.

@Rasp You would really do me a favor if you go to that support group again. Not only once, but at least 10 times. If there are multiple ones, choose a different one than last time. Otherwise the same is also fine. You don't want to continue rotting! ;) You don't want that. And you don't have to. I have to rot here atm, at least until the year ends, but I'll be happy when it ends. Although I have my troubles as well, as I said. Do they meet weekly? When?

@Rasp My feeling is that everything would be solvable (to some extent) if you would try to less tell yourself it isn't. What jobs have you tried? What was the last video game you played for longer than an hour? And how were those other affected people toxic? Toxic is a strong word. Maybe you use it too much. You believe yourself too much maybe.

@Rasp Isn't it also about what you tell yourself? Maybe try to tell you a bit less that you want to die. It's obviously not true, as you are still alive. You want to be happier, actually, right? Aren't there ways to meet other people with similar troubles, so one can support each other? As a first step. Do you have any more positive wishes than dying? Focussing on those might also give you some emotional energy?!

@Rasp Well, I'm 40, no family (I never wanted that, though), and all good friends that I had are basically gone now, as they all started family things, moved away, etc, and all became kind of pointless as actual friends. They were funny and cool back then, but nowadays, the highlight is a barbecue with their family on a Sunday. Last time I lost my drivers license for a month as I wanted home too fast. ^^

Isn't there something that makes you laugh?

If medicine doesn't help, you must be you med.

@Rasp To find ways to deal with it somehow, without having major problems, without hating everybody, and with a little more happiness. Many people have some kind of medical troubles to withstand, and it's often impressive to me how they find their ways. It might take some time. But it's worth it. I'm sure that your situation isn't easy as well. And again, I'll not bother you with trivial stupid hints. But be strong! Do you want to tell me details about your particular issue? Just if you want!

@Rasp I literally spend my money in order to make me move atm, as I cannot use my feet for the next months. But what has money to do with hating people? I'm sure that all stupid trivial hints that I could give you are worthless in your situation. But I'm positive that you will find a way eventually! I would like that a lot!

@Rasp I'm really not an expert, but I hope that it's not completely hopeless. People sometimes say "extremely unlikely" and then it turns out to happen anyways. Do you have some people around you? If not, I'm sure it's possible to change that, and that it would help a lot. And what medical support can you get?

@Rasp :( I hope you find a way to deal with it in a more positive way! And that you have some nice people around you that can help you a bit on that way.

@joeyh Full ACK. It's enough for me that a fresh Firefox constantly tries to autocomplete what I type to 'facebook.com', 'whatsapp.whatever' and similar, although I've never visited those sites and never want to.

Firefox was just the 'a little bit less annoying browser' since around a decade. Enshittification. I really hope there will be a usable fork or a patched version in Debian.

I really don't know yet how I'd deal with it if not.