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   Morghur the Sealgave (morghur@seal.cafe)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:25 JST Morghur the Sealgave
   God, almost 4 hours wasted because my dad is a lying useless retard.
   
   Maybe that's why i'm a useless retard
   • Embed this notice
     AlabasterBrick ?‍☠️ (alabasterbrick@nicecrew.digital)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:04 JST AlabasterBrick ?‍☠️

     in reply to

     • Dan_Hulson
     • PeachySummer
     I use the @Dan_Hulson method and smack the shit out of them.
   • Embed this notice
     PeachySummer (peachysummer@nicecrew.digital)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:05 JST PeachySummer

     in reply to
     https://shorturl.at/ZV1NP
   • Embed this notice
     Morghur the Sealgave (morghur@seal.cafe)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:08 JST Morghur the Sealgave

     in reply to

     • PeachySummer
     I'm very afraid that they will get mad at me for that. Or worse, that i need to go back to a shrink and make them waste money. And there is always the possibility that they will get mad, ignore it or them trying to guilt trip me.
     
     I also thought about writing something for my best friend in order to explain him how deranged, jealous and spiteful i've grown in the last months since we don't have time to meet IRL and our talks are very short. And i also fear he will grow afraid of me and leave me
   • Embed this notice
     Morghur the Sealgave (morghur@seal.cafe)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:09 JST Morghur the Sealgave

     in reply to

     • PeachySummer
     I also know she was right. But i'm just a smalltime retard that even struggles talking to random people. For me, explaining important stuff to my parents looks like a massive undertaking.
   • Embed this notice
     PeachySummer (peachysummer@nicecrew.digital)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:09 JST PeachySummer

     in reply to
     Perhaps you can write it down so they can read it.
     I have to do that when I'm really flustered about things.
   • Embed this notice
     Morghur the Sealgave (morghur@seal.cafe)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:10 JST Morghur the Sealgave

     in reply to

     • PeachySummer
     Yeah, the shrink i saw once told me i also should be more assertive and stuff. But when you are in a disadvantageous position like this i really think i have no saying on the matter since they will, without a doubt, hang the fact that i'm living at their home over my head. I could pay rent so they leave me alone but they just yammer about "Get a job and be productive".
     
     I understand they want me to leave home by being unbearable and overbearing, but it will reach a point that if i find a good stable job and i have enough savings, i will leave and never return. I will never speak again to my family, only after both of them have died. You might think it's cruel, spiteful and heartless, but i am cruel and spiteful.
   • Embed this notice
     PeachySummer (peachysummer@nicecrew.digital)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:10 JST PeachySummer

     in reply to
     You're neither cruel nor spiteful.
     Your therapist was right.
   • Embed this notice
     Morghur the Sealgave (morghur@seal.cafe)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:11 JST Morghur the Sealgave

     in reply to

     • PeachySummer
     No. And if i'm honest i think i'm wasting my breath trying to voice my opinions, preferences and concerns to my parents.
   • Embed this notice
     PeachySummer (peachysummer@nicecrew.digital)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:11 JST PeachySummer

     in reply to
     If you bumped shoulders with someone, you'd say sorry and move on.
     If you knew that someone had bad arthritis in their shoulders, you'd take extra special care to avoid bumping them right?
     You'd only know what effect your actions have on someone if they told you.
     You have to tell the people you live with what their actions do to you. Otherwise you'll be harboring these very negative feelings and they won't know why.
     If you don't voice what goes on for you, then you deserve to suffer the consequences. It is YOUR responsibility to make it known. If they don't care, so be it, but you need to take that step.
   • Embed this notice
     PeachySummer (peachysummer@nicecrew.digital)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:12 JST PeachySummer

     in reply to
     Please remind your mother that comparison is the thief of joy.
     If she wanted to steal all of your life's joy away, she's found a way to do it. Such cruelty should not be displayed by a mother.
   • Embed this notice
     Morghur the Sealgave (morghur@seal.cafe)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:12 JST Morghur the Sealgave

     in reply to

     • PeachySummer
     Unfortunately she firmly believes that doing it will piss me off enough for me to take things seriously and outshine those other people out of spite.
     
     In reality, it just crushes my spirit to the point i don't want to bother with it.
   • Embed this notice
     PeachySummer (peachysummer@nicecrew.digital)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:12 JST PeachySummer

     in reply to
     Have you told her this?
   • Embed this notice
     PeachySummer (peachysummer@nicecrew.digital)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:13 JST PeachySummer

     in reply to
     As I see it, your time belongs to you.
     There are things you have to do with it (work, help parents, sleep, etc) but the rest is yours.
     It's ok to carve out time for something that helps you grow as a person like illustrating and reading and such.
     You don't have to feel guilty for being "unproductive" in other people's eyes.
     This is something that took me a long time to learn. My dad was very hard on me and my sisters so taking time for myself to just chill makes me feel very guilty, even though it's necessary for everyone to do that from time to time.
   • Embed this notice
     Morghur the Sealgave (morghur@seal.cafe)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:13 JST Morghur the Sealgave

     in reply to

     • PeachySummer
     By the way they say it, i'm unproductive most of the time. It doesn't matter if i keep studying art on my own or drawing, or try to keep writing my stupid stuff, i'm unproductive so long as i don't earn money. It's always been like this, i can't have time to enjoy myself. They gift me a book about birds and recommend me an ornithology club but when i go watch birds on my own, they bitch about it.
     
     For me, drawing and writing are probably the only things keeping me afloat. Is my small island of autistic peace that i can stay in. I wish i could share with others what i do more oftenly but i know it's either not good or i wouldn't be able to draw any interest.
     
     And i know how you feel. In my case it's my mother who pushes me hard. Worst of all, she constantly compares me to everyone around me. My cousins, her friend's kids... All how about they worked hard and became successful and amazing and how much of a failure i am compared to them. It really crushes me
   • Embed this notice
     PeachySummer (peachysummer@nicecrew.digital)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:14 JST PeachySummer

     in reply to
     Reevaluating your priorities might help.
     What is your energy best spent doing right now?
     What benefits can you reap from doing that activity?
     Can you afford to expend energy on a passion project?
     Is this a realistic future you're envisioning?
   • Embed this notice
     Morghur the Sealgave (morghur@seal.cafe)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:14 JST Morghur the Sealgave

     in reply to

     • PeachySummer
     Problem is i know my passion project will go nowhere. I've already come to terms with the fact that no matter how much i cultivate my skills or how much effort i put it will most likely go nowhere. Production values today are up the roof and people usually don't pay mind to propped up small fries. I know i sound very negative, but i rather get all the facts straight.
     
     So essentially, my only and best option is maybe become a wagie. Or hope that i inherit properties from my parents and become a landlord
   • Embed this notice
     PeachySummer (peachysummer@nicecrew.digital)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:15 JST PeachySummer

     in reply to
     You've already been working towards simplifying your life.
     That's a great goal, but you gotta keep going. We all get in a rut and lose hope.
     You're doing great!
   • Embed this notice
     Morghur the Sealgave (morghur@seal.cafe)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:15 JST Morghur the Sealgave

     in reply to

     • PeachySummer
     The main problem for me is keeping motivation. I want to keep my stupid project going, even if it's at a snail's pace i don't want to let my dream die.
     
     I just wish i could do something with it but i'm a small stupid retard. So i just have to become a souless wagie
   • Embed this notice
     Morghur the Sealgave (morghur@seal.cafe)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:16 JST Morghur the Sealgave

     in reply to

     • PeachySummer
     I try. I know they are not perfect and neither am i. But sometimes it's so painful. Or annoying.
     
     I honestly think i'm not made for the modern world sometimes. The responsabilities are just too big
   • Embed this notice
     Morghur the Sealgave (morghur@seal.cafe)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:17 JST Morghur the Sealgave

     in reply to

     • PeachySummer
     To a certain degree i get it since my mom was obsessed with me calling every week when i went for work in Germany and she tells me constantly i'm dad's favourite.
     
     I understand it, but they oscillate between needing to know constantly about me to not wanting to see me for a while. Like right now, my mom constantly talks about me leaving home or having my own place. But i bet she will demand photos or she will go visit to know if my house is not a wasteland of garbage
   • Embed this notice
     PeachySummer (peachysummer@nicecrew.digital)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:17 JST PeachySummer

     in reply to
     Mama and papa want to love you the way you need to be loved, but they just don't know how. They try so hard but still miss the mark.
     Please be patient with them :hug_apu:
   • Embed this notice
     Morghur the Sealgave (morghur@seal.cafe)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:18 JST Morghur the Sealgave

     in reply to

     • PeachySummer
     I doubt it will work. Plus, they are the kind of people that want inmediate results on most things. Doesn't matter if i tell them to be patient or stuff like that, they will just ignore it and keep grilling me about it.
     
     Also, they will push me to try to turn my hobbies like a business or make something out of it. Kind of why they want me to study art seriously or publish my retarded writings
   • Embed this notice
     PeachySummer (peachysummer@nicecrew.digital)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:18 JST PeachySummer

     in reply to
     Maybe you can tell them that you want to figure things out on your own and the best thing they can do for you is to let that play out.
     I think parents get afraid sometimes that their kids will never need their advice again, but you can assure them that you'll let them know when you need them.
   • Embed this notice
     Morghur the Sealgave (morghur@seal.cafe)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:19 JST Morghur the Sealgave

     in reply to

     • PeachySummer
     I know what you mean. They do what they think it's best for me without much consideration about if i just do the opposite out of spite because i can't do what i like or stuff like that. They want me to be successful in life and all, but tbh i don't care much about money and fame like they do.
     
     It's a stark difference between me and them (and probably a lot of people) that i just want a good balance in life to be happy and probably, enjoy life with less. For them, it's like i give up/i'm lazy/ i'm an underachiever but someone already told them time ago that i work hard on what i really like. It boils down to that.
     
     I also get what you mean with the "They are not going to live forever" since my mom worries a lot about what i'm going to do once they croak. But i think i'll manage since i'm willing to bite the bullet if the needs arise. Plus, she yammers constantly about how when dad dies me and my brother will end up rich as fuck
   • Embed this notice
     PeachySummer (peachysummer@nicecrew.digital)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:19 JST PeachySummer

     in reply to
     I think telling them that you don't need much to be happy when they get onto you about this would be good.
     Letting them know that you prefer to keep life simple could make them think twice about bringing it up the next time.
   • Embed this notice
     Morghur the Sealgave (morghur@seal.cafe)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:20 JST Morghur the Sealgave

     in reply to

     • PeachySummer
     Yeah. They don't care at all and keep yammering that they try to push me in the right direction towards a good future where i can be happy.
     
     They've done it for a long time and tbh i think they will do it until they croak
   • Embed this notice
     PeachySummer (peachysummer@nicecrew.digital)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:20 JST PeachySummer

     in reply to
     Have you ever tried to help someone and you were so aure you had the solution but then it ends up more fucked than it was before?
     Your parents are probably sure that hounding you will work and they continue to double down on it because it worked for them when their parents did it.
     Parents are just people too. They don't have magical knowledge just because you survived to adulthood.
     They're doing what they know how to do and they're afraid of you ending up in need. They're not going to live forever and they know it. They want you to be successful, but they don't know what it takes to get there in today's world.
     You know they want the best for you.
   • Embed this notice
     Morghur the Sealgave (morghur@seal.cafe)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:21 JST Morghur the Sealgave

     in reply to

     • PeachySummer
     I mean, i would help them gladly if they weren't constantly condescending to me about how much of a waste of potential i am compared to everyone around me and pushing me to do 4 different things i don't want to do.
     
     After all, when my aunt had to go to the city for chemo every 2 days, it was me who drove it so my parents didn't had to wake up at 7 in the morning
   • Embed this notice
     PeachySummer (peachysummer@nicecrew.digital)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:21 JST PeachySummer

     in reply to
     Have you talked to them about how it all effects you?
   • Embed this notice
     Morghur the Sealgave (morghur@seal.cafe)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:22 JST Morghur the Sealgave

     in reply to

     • PeachySummer
     Thing is i resent my parents for all this crap so much i honestly don't want to see them ever again.
   • Embed this notice
     PeachySummer (peachysummer@nicecrew.digital)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:22 JST PeachySummer

     in reply to
     Look at it like this:
     If we were to RETVRN to tradition, you'd be helping the fuck out of your parents until you die.
     Just help them dude. They won't be here forever.
   • Embed this notice
     Morghur the Sealgave (morghur@seal.cafe)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:23 JST Morghur the Sealgave

     in reply to

     • PeachySummer
     More like he's taking into account i'm also unemployed.
     He asked me when i go back to work in September so he can enslave me for a couple of weeks he has a lot of work.
     
     Thank god next year i'll be out until November. Maybe even not coming back home
   • Embed this notice
     PeachySummer (peachysummer@nicecrew.digital)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:23 JST PeachySummer

     in reply to
     That's good. When you live on your own, you can decide what you do with your time.
   • Embed this notice
     Morghur the Sealgave (morghur@seal.cafe)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:24 JST Morghur the Sealgave

     in reply to

     • PeachySummer
     That fucker is pretty much taking advantage of me for having the truck license and forces me to drive his deathtrap of a truck around. I went to pick it up from the car shop where it was and when i arrive back at his warehouse, the fucker tells me i also have to load it.
     
     And i also will have to drive that pile of garbage on Sunday
   • Embed this notice
     PeachySummer (peachysummer@nicecrew.digital)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:24 JST PeachySummer

     in reply to
     He's taking into account the fact that you live in his house.
     Fair or not, parents are like that.
     Gotta deal.
   • Embed this notice
     PeachySummer (peachysummer@nicecrew.digital)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 02:57:25 JST PeachySummer

     in reply to
     👀 vague as hell innit
   • Embed this notice
     AlabasterBrick ?‍☠️ (alabasterbrick@nicecrew.digital)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 03:10:30 JST AlabasterBrick ?‍☠️

     in reply to

     • Dan_Hulson
     • PeachySummer
     I don't scroll up
     :02shrug:
   • Embed this notice
     PeachySummer (peachysummer@nicecrew.digital)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 03:10:31 JST PeachySummer

     in reply to

     • Dan_Hulson
     • AlabasterBrick ?‍☠️
     😐
   • Embed this notice
     AlabasterBrick ?‍☠️ (alabasterbrick@nicecrew.digital)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 03:16:28 JST AlabasterBrick ?‍☠️

     in reply to

     • Dan_Hulson
     • PeachySummer
     I am not emotional! I like smacking retarded people
   • Embed this notice
     PeachySummer (peachysummer@nicecrew.digital)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 03:16:29 JST PeachySummer

     in reply to

     • Dan_Hulson
     • AlabasterBrick ?‍☠️
     You tards are just coming to make jokes to lighten up a thread about emotional things that you may have found yourself feeling, so you are both forgiven because boys are just like that.
   • Embed this notice
     Dan_Hulson (dan_hulson@poa.st)'s status on Saturday, 24-Aug-2024 03:16:30 JST Dan_Hulson

     in reply to

     • AlabasterBrick ?‍☠️
     • PeachySummer
     @AlabasterBrick @PeachySummer @Morghur Ignore Peachy she just upset I klepped Precious and not gonna let her come the wedding until she super nice to me