@hellomiakoda Yeehup. "Oh, but each of these diagnosies is an xx%, so the odds that any one person would ..."

... except, several of them are comorbid. Whether due to genetics (I've heard suggestions of autism being linked to hypermobility and IBS), side effects (trauma ...) or something else.

@hellomiakoda Yep. I'm not going to say I exactly understand what you're going through (I don't, as far as I know I'm not a system and have never been), but I have enough awareness of my own lack of knowledge to ... take your word for it. This is something that hurts you, and I understand feeling grief when such and integral part of you dies or disappears (if you have shared what happened, I haven't read it, and if you haven't, I'm not planning on prying).

I wish society as a whole would move away from this "if it's not 'normal' it's broken" thing >.<

@hellomiakoda I'm so sorry to hear. It sounds very painful, especially with how so much of the world views plurality and systems. I'm not plural, but you have my sympathy and condolences.

@peter_sc And it gets even more demeaning and insulting when you realise something ...

want to know who's most likely to be mistaken for/accused of using AI? Yep, us autists! >.<

@pathfinder @hellomiakoda But picking on something other than the pregnant person would hinder the agenda of blaming women (used to be that kids "became autistic" because their mom wasn't "warm" enough, then we had the "mom took them to get vaccinated", so it is only logical that "mom dared to want a relief from her god-given punishment of a painful pregnancy")

@hellomiakoda @gastarbajterica Eugh. Yeah, there's this "spectrum" that normies like to assume exists: non-verbal (or visibly disabled) = "intellectually disabled" on one end and "smart/intelligent" = "can't be disabled" on the other >.<

@gastarbajterica @hellomiakoda There was a case of someone whose name I don't remember (the article on him flittered past a while back). He was non-verbal, so *obviously* he was "intellectually disabled" (to be clear here, I'm not judging people who are, I'm judging people who have prejudice) ... except someone helped figure out how he could communicate in a way that worked with him, and he's now been accepted into ... I think it was Harvard.

@gastarbajterica @hellomiakoda I think one of my "favourite" quotes about low/high functioning labels: "low function is used to deny us agency; high function is used to deny us support"

(I'm also one of the "in the middle". Quite verbal, aka good at talking, pretty damned smart and good at picking up a lot of new skills ... but as much as I'm decent at dealing with people, it exhausts me, and I'm "high functioning" riiight up until I'm not)

@hellomiakoda I'm going to make an educated guess on who comes visiting within a week after those days >.> (because that + a surreal sweet tooth are *my* best indicators).

Okay, so I today ran into someone (online) who claimed a thing I've *never* heard. So I'll ask if either of you have heard (or experience) this, with no judgement from me, to be clear.

Apparently autism in girls/women can show up as being "overly sexual with themselves and everyone they interact with". Like touching themselves intimately, having multiple partners, wanting to be naked (for reasons other than sensory issues), according to this person, and ... Yeah. I've never heard about that!

How about you, fellow @actuallyautistic folks?

@TheBreadmonkey As someone in the comments mentioned, I *too* have had to answer "are you a bot" with "no, I'm autistic". Because gods forbid someone with a keen interest in language and the melody of sounds actually knows "high end" words.

(I also love em-dashes, where whether I use the -- or — depends on whether I've written the thing in something that automatically formats it--Scrivener, Word, Notion--or if I'm taking the extra second to press Alt+0151)

@TheBreadmonkey Yeah, people can take em-dashes, semicolons and parentheses from my cold, dead, no-longer-literate hands <.< How could I write something if there's no space for side thoughts or tangents! (which, btw, is a thing I've decided to allow myself, now that I recognise that it's part of the whole "being autistic" thing, at least for me. If people can't handle meandering writing, that seems like *their* problem >.>)

@hellomiakoda @nellie_m @pythno @actuallyautistic Exactly same. on the outside I was "high functioning" (so much, in fact, that no one even thought I was autistic for the longest time), but in reality? I was working myself int an early grave, and if I'd had less mental abilities (and/or willingness to sacrifice myself), it would've been visible so much earlier.

@Tooden @theautisticcoach @actuallyautistic Yep.

I'm now in my 40s, and for the last few years I've worked with specialists (a pain clinic) that also includes a psychiatrist (they're a cross-discipline team, working with both physial and mental drs and therapists), and we went from "oh, maybe Mel can work 50% ... okay, maybe Mel can work 25%? ... well, it doesn't look like Mel can work at all" and I've literally needed therapy to accept that. Once I did accept it I *did* get into a better headspace ("only" need to figure out money now >.<) ... but I haven't talked much about this to parts of my family. And I got confirmation of why a couple of months ago: My oldest sister stating that she hoped that the unemployment agency (who wrote a certificate that we've tried everything, I can't do it) didn't do it "just because you've given up". And also was quick to claim that the difference between me and my (decently successful siblings) is that I've "always had an easier time giving up".

Which ... Hurt a lot. And while they 100% have worked for what they have, don't get me wrong ... I have *tried*. I have tried so hard that I almost worked myself into an early grave. So, to get the "lazy" thing thrown into my face was ... not fun.

(the note from the agency includes "Mel is very loyal, ambitious and wants to work, but we have gotten to the conclusion that no matter how much they want to, they can't")

@theautisticcoach @actuallyautistic
- That you're not a real autist (mainly by society, this is not directed at people following the hashtag or group) if you masked well enough to not be discovered until you were an adult

- Tying into the above: that if you don't fit into the narrow view of yesteryears of what autism is (which often includes being white and male ...), you're also not autistic

- That high/low functioning is a sliding scale on one axle: if you're "low functioning" within one area, that means you are in *all* areas, and that if you're "high functioning" then you never need any support

- That high/low functioning is a useful metric in any way. This ties into the prior one: yes, knowing for each individual what support they need is important, but a non-verbal person with a special interest tying into something like programming and who gets to WFH might do a *lot* better than someone who on the surface seems allistic because they know how to do smalltalk, they know how to do these various things ... but no one looks behind the curtain where the person is exhausted all the time due to social interactions, deadlines, etc

- That you *can*, if you just want to