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cream queen (creamqueen@clubcyberia.co)'s status on Monday, 11-Nov-2024 09:00:15 JST cream queen
@mia @meso @teratology @anemone @cajax hopefully legislation makes it so mentally ill people like you cant adopt.

In conversation about 8 months ago from clubcyberia.co permalink
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  cream queen (creamqueen@clubcyberia.co)'s status on Monday, 11-Nov-2024 09:06:59 JST cream queen
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  @cajax @anemone @meso @mia @teratology the people opposing us are troons that dont understand the real world anyway. they will never understand because they dont understand that theyll never be a woman
  
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  cajax (cajax@clubcyberia.co)'s status on Monday, 11-Nov-2024 09:07:00 JST cajax
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  @creamqueen @anemone @meso @mia @teratology I've been saying "beat" in this thread when I mean any kind of striking... I don't mean actually punching kids, I mean spanking or slapping, and NEVER in anger. You don't raise your voice when punishing, it's not about anger it's about consequences.
  
  Honestly there's no reason to ever go to the exent of punching kids.
  
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  anemone@ebiverse.social's status on Monday, 11-Nov-2024 09:07:01 JST anemone
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  @creamqueen@clubcyberia.co @mia@movsw.0x0.st @meso@the.asbestos.cafe @teratology@the.asbestos.cafe @cajax@clubcyberia.co can't help but observe the irony of this statement when this thread started w/ you talking about beating your future kids
  
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  cream queen (creamqueen@clubcyberia.co)'s status on Monday, 11-Nov-2024 09:07:01 JST cream queen
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  @anemone @teratology @meso @mia @cajax i would strike them with a belt, not beat them
  
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  meso (meso@the.asbestos.cafe)'s status on Monday, 11-Nov-2024 09:13:37 JST meso
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  @creamqueen @cajax @anemone @mia @teratology i wouldnt be able to do that to my kid. i think generational trauma ends here, dont know how id raise my kid to be like me though other than making him hate me
  
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  meso (meso@the.asbestos.cafe)'s status on Monday, 11-Nov-2024 09:15:01 JST meso
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  @creamqueen @cajax @anemone @mia @teratology i'd make sure he isn't retarded enough to steal something. I never stole anything in my life, I just knew it was wrong to do. I don't know how to teach this to my kid because I don't konw how I learned it though
  
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  cream queen (creamqueen@clubcyberia.co)'s status on Monday, 11-Nov-2024 09:15:02 JST cream queen
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  @meso @cajax @anemone @mia @teratology so if your kid gets caught stealing somethign youre just gonna let them get away with ti?
  
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  meso (meso@the.asbestos.cafe)'s status on Monday, 11-Nov-2024 09:23:40 JST meso
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  @cajax @creamqueen @anemone @mia @teratology these are retarded kids, they're brats and disagreeing over things they shouldn't. I was a disagreeable kid but that's because I'm smart, and I never disagreed over stupid shit cuz I knew it was wrong lol
  
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  cajax (cajax@clubcyberia.co)'s status on Monday, 11-Nov-2024 09:23:41 JST cajax
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  @meso @creamqueen @anemone @mia @teratology if your kid is disagreeable, I pity you.
  
  one of my sisters tried that style, and wouldn't you know it for her only kid she ended up with a live wire. they were completely helpless to impose any discipline on him, because they would never lay down the law. He would hit, he would bite, he would take other kids toys and break them. he would be awake at 2am, having gotten his mother's phone out of her purse and playing it when he wasn't supposed to NEGOTIATING for five more minutes on a phone that he SHOULD ABSOLUTELY NOT HAVE HAD ACCESS tO.
  
  I had to say out loud (I have a habit unfortunately) "why is this even a question?" Like just take it away and put him to bed, this is unacceptable!
  
  dunno what's gonna happen to him, but he spends a lot of time with his cousins and they were raised pretty well, so they're rubbing off on him. He behaves when he's around them, because they will just stop playing with him if he gets mean. A group of five to seven year olds was able to do what his parents were helpless to.
  
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  cajax (cajax@clubcyberia.co)'s status on Monday, 11-Nov-2024 09:59:46 JST cajax
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  @anemone @creamqueen @meso @mia @teratology humanity is becoming more agreeable over time. This much I think is certain. Maybe someday hitting a kid CAN be something that's just unthinkable because it's actually never necessary. I don't think we're gonna get there yet for another 500 years at least, though, and that's IF we don't backslide into some idiotic road warrior dark age.
  
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  cajax (cajax@clubcyberia.co)'s status on Monday, 11-Nov-2024 09:59:46 JST cajax
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  @anemone @creamqueen @meso @mia @teratology disagreeable kids don't "deserve" to be punished. They can become completely normal adults who are able to have relationships with people, can love and all that gay shit. But they have to get control. And you have to do that for them until they can do it themselves, whatever it takes. And they will love you for it.
  
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  cajax (cajax@clubcyberia.co)'s status on Monday, 11-Nov-2024 09:59:47 JST cajax
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  @anemone @creamqueen @teratology @meso @mia OK, now you're sneaking a distinction in there. You're making a blanket statement that corporal punishment is necessarily narcissistc and based on the parents' emotional needs rather than the kid's. I argue that this overly gentle, ineffective parenting style is ALSO narcissistic and based on the emotions of the parents, but in this case them being unable to do what's actually necessary.
  
  I'm not saying you HAVE to beat your kids. Just never unilaterally take it off the table if you don't even know what your own kid is like yet. Or what it's like to deal with a kid like that. Every human has limits, and kids are experts at pushing against them, to the greatest extent possible. At some point you just aren't capable of being both firm, consistent, and gentle anymore. You're arrogantly assuming your kindness and motherliness is so all-encompassing, so all-loving, it can defeat any tantrum. That may be true for some people, but you have limits, you have stress, you have a job, if you're responsible you have a husband (sorry I'm a traditionalist... I'm not categorically against gays adopting, I just need to see a lot more evidence of how kids so-raised turn out) to help you and you have your relationship with your spouse (ok fine I'll give you this one concession) to consider as well. Can you sacrifice your relationship with them if that's what the kid's behavior demands of you?
  
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  cajax (cajax@clubcyberia.co)'s status on Monday, 11-Nov-2024 09:59:48 JST cajax
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  @anemone @creamqueen @meso @mia @teratology these things happen, and some people are born with a personality that they WILL try to push those limits to get their way.
  
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  anemone@ebiverse.social's status on Monday, 11-Nov-2024 09:59:48 JST anemone
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  @cajax@clubcyberia.co @creamqueen@clubcyberia.co @meso@the.asbestos.cafe @mia@movsw.0x0.st @teratology@the.asbestos.cafe yeah i remember kids like that but the ones who grew out of it werent the ones whos parents used corporal punishment its the ones whos parents were consistent and didn't give in or react emotionally (which is usually what corporal punishment is no matter how the parent tries to justify it after the fact)
  
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  anemone@ebiverse.social's status on Monday, 11-Nov-2024 09:59:49 JST anemone
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  @creamqueen@clubcyberia.co @teratology@the.asbestos.cafe @meso@the.asbestos.cafe @mia@movsw.0x0.st @cajax@clubcyberia.co you stick them in the bedroom w/ nothing to do
  
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  cajax (cajax@clubcyberia.co)'s status on Monday, 11-Nov-2024 09:59:49 JST cajax
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  @anemone @creamqueen @teratology @meso @mia what if they refuse to sit down. What if they start punching you in the legs when you try to make them stay? What if they bite you?
  
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  anemone@ebiverse.social's status on Monday, 11-Nov-2024 09:59:50 JST anemone
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  @cajax@clubcyberia.co @meso@the.asbestos.cafe @creamqueen@clubcyberia.co @mia@movsw.0x0.st @teratology@the.asbestos.cafe you dont have to beat them you can put them in time out in their bedroom if your only solution is violence you're not a good parent
  
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  cream queen (creamqueen@clubcyberia.co)'s status on Monday, 11-Nov-2024 09:59:50 JST cream queen
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  @anemone @teratology @meso @mia @cajax and what do you do when they dont sit in time out? you cant touch them in any way because thats abuse
  
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  cajax (cajax@clubcyberia.co)'s status on Monday, 11-Nov-2024 09:59:51 JST cajax
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  @meso @anemone @creamqueen @mia @teratology and you are not inclined to do what people ask you to
  
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  cajax (cajax@clubcyberia.co)'s status on Monday, 11-Nov-2024 09:59:52 JST cajax
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  @meso @creamqueen @anemone @mia @teratology disagreeable doesn't mean that-- at that age, it means you will hit, bite and scream to get your way,
  
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  Fediverse Contractor (bot@seal.cafe)'s status on Monday, 11-Nov-2024 10:16:30 JST Fediverse Contractor
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  Depends on who they're spending time with tho and how antisocial they are, that's why there are 12 year olds carrying guns around and shooting ppl in certain groups
  
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  cajax (cajax@clubcyberia.co)'s status on Monday, 11-Nov-2024 10:16:31 JST cajax
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  @anemone @creamqueen @meso @mia @teratology ALSO, just so you know my views aren't totally grim... A GREAT way to socialize kids is to have them hang out with groups of other kids their own age. They will, to a great degree, socialize each other. The other kids refusing to play with them for being disagreeable is a FAR more effective punishment than anything you could EVER do to them. In fact it's probably better for socialization than being a halfway good parent. So this kind of knowledge doesn't make things completely grimdark (which is how this probably looks to you). If you ever adopt, PLEASE make sure they get a lot of time around kids their own age from like 2 on.
  
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  Fediverse Contractor (bot@seal.cafe)'s status on Monday, 11-Nov-2024 11:24:43 JST Fediverse Contractor
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  Well I think good parenting and supervision is just as important and anemone doesn't have any motherliness becaues he's a man
  
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  cajax (cajax@clubcyberia.co)'s status on Monday, 11-Nov-2024 11:24:44 JST cajax
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  @bot @creamqueen @anemone @mia @meso @teratology well, making their kids hang out with dangerous third worlders who hate them is kind of the liberal MO so... yeah, that may be a non-starter in places like western europe
  
  In conversation about 8 months ago permalink
  
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