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   CJ Bellwether (siege@octodon.social)'s status on Tuesday, 28-Nov-2023 11:39:16 JST CJ Bellwether

   when i was first coming out, there was Scout who had come out a few years prior and i remember very early on reading them saying they had no more time for trans babies after one had come up to them in a shop to talk. I remember them talking about how it was neverending, for every one there is another four and then sixteen in a never ending flood so they were just done.

   That comes back to me a lot at times as a statement. I didnt agree with it, i still dont. But i have found i definitely have no sympathy or time to give trans people who are in that void of "im not going to transition because its horrible and this is a curse and id rather do anything but be trans".

   My response to that now is always a sharp response. Because there are parts i feel Scout was right, there is that never ending flood of trans people coming out who need help, there is no time to be bothering with ones who are playing the weird reverse denial headgame of "i dont want to and im going to be abusive to everyone but im still going to post aobut it continually because i need someone to save me and convince me". And im just like, no, absolutely not, theres continual trans babies coming out of the woodwork who are able to say they need help, you are not special and i dont care if you dont transition and continue to have a miserable life in the closet, i dont know who you are, you're a blip in an endless flood. If you're expecting everyone to play your game of reverse pushing you to transition, just no, no one has that energy.

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     CJ Bellwether (siege@octodon.social)'s status on Tuesday, 28-Nov-2023 11:59:11 JST CJ Bellwether

     in reply to

     and its not that i dont have time for people who are still figuring it out, i will happily listen and chat to people who are deep into this is just a fetish for me territory, people who are i cant because of my family and its just not a possible reality for me, where ever they're at, i see it as a chance to really gauge where their head is at and what preconceptions they have about being trans and at what point does someone become trans etc.

     But as soon as its someone who is (often like 18-19-20) vocalising their internalised transphobia projecting it onto everyone and claiming that their pretend normal existence is good and being trans is bad, my only mode of engagement is straight up wanting to explain that however they may think about trans women, they are so far below that rung in terms of existence.

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     CJ Bellwether (siege@octodon.social)'s status on Tuesday, 28-Nov-2023 12:09:42 JST CJ Bellwether

     in reply to

     • Alex von Kitchen

     @Dangerous_beans yeah, absolutely, i think theres a part of me that just needs to convey to them that no one is going to save them and no one will notice if they dont transition. I still feel at least 85% of trans people are in the same position as them, not transitioning, so theres nothing new or magical about denial and pushing it away. You're the girl in the horror movie who runs up the stairs when the killer is inside rather than gets out of the house.

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     Alex von Kitchen (dangerous_beans@aus.social)'s status on Tuesday, 28-Nov-2023 12:09:43 JST Alex von Kitchen

     in reply to

     @siege sometimes the kind thing to do is to point out they have just called our existence for the last decade+ horrible and maybe they should fuck off about it and deal with their shit themselves

     i remember people talking about the flood of baby trans back when i was one, and the number has only increased. it's nice, but also tiring dealing with them all