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1. Embed this notice
   sal (sal@brain.worm.pink)'s status on Thursday, 09-Nov-2023 23:15:19 JST sal

   • goatsarah
   • Your Autistic Life
   • haui
   • Brain Pilgrim
   @goatsarah @pathfinder @yourautisticlife @haui @brainpilgrim Hi! Everyone is a person, including bad and abusive people.
   
   Is there a reason you feel it's appropriate to use this kind of ableist dehumanization in the @actuallyautistic group?
   
   Instead of treating entitled and abusive behavior as an issue of "pathology" or "deviance," you could look at the actual social norms and power-relations that give rise to it!
   
   https://butchanarchy.medium.com/intimate-authoritarianism-the-ideology-of-abuse-797843da226b
   • Embed this notice
     ajlanes (ajlanes@thegoatery.dyndns.org)'s status on Thursday, 09-Nov-2023 23:15:16 JST ajlanes

     in reply to
     @sal @actuallyautistic I don’t think it’s appropriate to ask victims to be complicit in their abuse.
   • Embed this notice
     ajlanes (ajlanes@thegoatery.dyndns.org)'s status on Friday, 10-Nov-2023 00:26:38 JST ajlanes

     in reply to

     • Léo :necoGlasses: :chaos: :wormverified:
     • Your Autistic Life
     • haui
     • Brain Pilgrim
     @tisanae @actuallyautistic @pathfinder @yourautisticlife @haui @brainpilgrim You don’t seem to be, as far as I can tell?
   • Embed this notice
     Léo :necoGlasses: :chaos: :wormverified: (tisanae@brain.worm.pink)'s status on Friday, 10-Nov-2023 00:26:42 JST Léo :necoGlasses: :chaos: :wormverified:

     • goatsarah
     • ajlanes
     • Your Autistic Life
     • haui
     • Brain Pilgrim
     @goatsarah @actuallyautistic @sal @pathfinder @yourautisticlife @haui @brainpilgrim @ajlanes why am I tagged in this :akko_wtf2:
   • Embed this notice
     lexx3000 (lexx3000@masto.ai)'s status on Friday, 10-Nov-2023 04:00:38 JST lexx3000

     in reply to

     • goatsarah
     • Your Autistic Life
     • haui
     • Brain Pilgrim

     @sal @actuallyautistic @pathfinder @haui @brainpilgrim @yourautisticlife @goatsarah hi, i'm officially f84.5 and officially having an empathy of a wall brick. so i could say i feel sorry for people with narcissistic disorder i met, i just don't. i don't really care. i like mushrooms, horror movies and mechanisms.

   • Embed this notice
     Brain Pilgrim (brainpilgrim@mastodon.social)'s status on Friday, 10-Nov-2023 04:17:45 JST Brain Pilgrim

     • goatsarah
     • Your Autistic Life
     • lexx3000
     • haui

     @goatsarah @pathfinder @sal@brain.worm.pink @yourautisticlife @haui @lexx3000

     Such parental challenges are a recipe for developing sensitive antennae and pervasive anxiety.

     🎪

   • Embed this notice
     Brain Pilgrim (brainpilgrim@mastodon.social)'s status on Friday, 10-Nov-2023 04:21:23 JST Brain Pilgrim

     in reply to

     • goatsarah
     • MooMoo the Cat
     • Your Autistic Life
     • lexx3000
     • haui

     @flowerpot @goatsarah @pathfinder @yourautisticlife @haui @lexx3000

     Also the psychopath-handling technique known as Gray Rock.

   • Embed this notice
     MooMoo the Cat (flowerpot@mas.to)'s status on Friday, 10-Nov-2023 04:21:24 JST MooMoo the Cat

     • goatsarah
     • Your Autistic Life
     • lexx3000
     • haui
     • Brain Pilgrim

     @goatsarah @brainpilgrim @pathfinder @yourautisticlife @haui @lexx3000 "The best thing to do with narcissists is to be boring, uninteresting, and run the hell away."

     Can confirm. This works.

   • Embed this notice
     Brain Pilgrim (brainpilgrim@mastodon.social)'s status on Friday, 10-Nov-2023 04:30:53 JST Brain Pilgrim

     • goatsarah
     • Your Autistic Life
     • lexx3000
     • haui

     @goatsarah @pathfinder @sal@brain.worm.pink @yourautisticlife @haui @lexx3000

     Down the Rabbit Hole
     The world of estranged parents' forums

     https://www.issendai.com/psychology/estrangement/index.html

   • Embed this notice
     Brain Pilgrim (brainpilgrim@mastodon.social)'s status on Friday, 10-Nov-2023 04:43:42 JST Brain Pilgrim

     • goatsarah
     • Your Autistic Life
     • lexx3000
     • haui

     @goatsarah @pathfinder @yourautisticlife @haui @lexx3000 I found it useful to send to people who didn't have a "circus upbringing."

   • Embed this notice
     ajlanes (ajlanes@thegoatery.dyndns.org)'s status on Friday, 10-Nov-2023 07:56:58 JST ajlanes

     • goatsarah
     • Your Autistic Life
     • lexx3000
     • haui
     • Brain Pilgrim
     @goatsarah @brainpilgrim @yourautisticlife @lexx3000 @pathfinder @haui Early on in my knowing about her, your m-i-l was so profoundly and deliberately offensive to you that it enraged me… and that was probably a useful learning experience.
   • Embed this notice
     Sylvain (axnxcamr@mstdn.ca)'s status on Wednesday, 15-Nov-2023 19:37:20 JST Sylvain

     in reply to

     • goatsarah
     • ajlanes

     @sal

     Is there a reason you feel it's appropriate to condescend the shit out of people in the @actuallyautistic group?

     @ajlanes @goatsarah

   • Embed this notice
     Dremmwel ar Vran Ruz (dremmwel@mamot.fr)'s status on Wednesday, 15-Nov-2023 19:37:20 JST Dremmwel ar Vran Ruz

     in reply to

     • goatsarah
     • Sylvain
     • ajlanes

     @axnxcamr @sal @ajlanes @goatsarah indeed, narcisists are persons but if you're not a person / professional trained to deal with them to help, the best remains to run away from these persons for your own safety.
     The fact that narcisists are at first victims of abuse or other threats doesn't justify to put yourself in danger trying to help them. That's precisely the aim of NPD: become unreachable.

     And in general, being a victim yourself doesn't justify to victimize others, indeed.

   • Embed this notice
     sal (sal@brain.worm.pink)'s status on Wednesday, 15-Nov-2023 19:37:22 JST sal

     in reply to

     • goatsarah
     • ajlanes
     • Your Autistic Life
     • haui
     • Brain Pilgrim
     @ajlanes @actuallyautistic @pathfinder @yourautisticlife @haui @brainpilgrim @goatsarah Hopefully soon you understand that that's not what's being asked, then.
   • Embed this notice
     Dremmwel ar Vran Ruz (dremmwel@mamot.fr)'s status on Wednesday, 15-Nov-2023 22:51:22 JST Dremmwel ar Vran Ruz

     in reply to

     • goatsarah
     • Sylvain
     • ajlanes

     @sal @axnxcamr @ajlanes @goatsarah thanks for this professoral lesson I didn't asked for :)
     Yes, I know the difference between the commonly accepted meaning of a word and its medical meaning, the confusion it can generate and the necessity to clarify what are we talking about. That's precisely why I won't change a word in my previous toot.
     Have a nice day !

   • Embed this notice
     sal (sal@brain.worm.pink)'s status on Wednesday, 15-Nov-2023 22:51:25 JST sal

     in reply to

     • Dremmwel ar Vran Ruz
     • goatsarah
     • Sylvain
     • ajlanes
     @Dremmwel @axnxcamr @ajlanes @goatsarah @actuallyautistic
     
     Ok, in the most generous possible interpretation, *MAYBE* you're confusing between how this term is used in the vernacular to describe selfish / abusive people, and how it's formally applied by psychiatrists and the DSM to many different people [REGARDLESS of whether or not those people are abusing anyone.]
     
     So if so, learn that those two are not synonymous or the same, and look at any of the several articles BY / FOR ABUSE SURVIVORS that I just linked to about the difference between someone being an abuser and someone having a psych diagnosis. Or read the excellent breakdown of the same in "Why Does He Do That."