Notices by dick_turpin (dick_turpin@mastodon.org.uk), page 2

@basil Mate, a few of them were sludge when I poured them out.

I'm not a big beer drinker I prefer whiskey. I bought too many at Christmas.

@basil Yeah

Well, that's distressing. Had to throw a lot of beer away given it had: Best before 28-01-25 on them. 😭

@ken_fallon

I am not American. 😛
@basil

Morning All

So apparently, Kier Starmer has offered himself to Trump.

https://www.politico.eu/article/how-keir-starmer-buttered-up-donald-trump/

𝗜 𝗦𝗛𝗜𝗧 𝗬𝗢𝗨 𝗡𝗢𝗧!

We have a laptop in, and the password is:

TheCompanyName12345 😱 🤦♂️

ROTFLMAO

Elon and Trump want to visit Fort Knox to double-check that there's actually some gold there.

This is comedy gold. I can't help it; I think he's hysterical.

Getting a tad frustrated. I need to send a PC to Health Spa, but I've no idea what cable to send for the monitor.

I purchased a domain for a customer, and I'm assured it's working, but the customer says she can't send it via it, which is holding me up from rolling it out to fourteen councillors.

And suddenly, I'm Accounts: "Why were we charged this much last month and yet this month we are being charged a whole lot less?"

@penguin42 It's in South Yorkshire. I think the missus might notice me missing, let alone work. 🤣

@kevie @luke @morph @Paul Morning. 👋

Morning All

OK, which of you bastards left the freezer door open last night? 🥶 ❄️

#TZAG

@ghostdancer It must have been pigging cold her last night because everywhere is permafrost.

@ghostdancer I wouldn't mind, but it was warming up!

Morning All

It's definitely getting lighter.
#TZAG

@ghostdancer @Paul

Morning 👋

Reading @chris's post, I was like 🧠 "Eight years?" then I looked, and I'm eight years in too!" I wonder if my time on identi.ca counts towards Fediverse association?

I keep asking the same question over and over again: How the fuck do people keep their jobs when they clearly don't know how to use the tools they are given?

𝗖𝘂𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗺𝗲𝗿: "All of my documents have been corrupted! They all look like this.

🧠 "𝘠𝘰𝘶'𝘷𝘦 𝘤𝘭𝘪𝘤𝘬𝘦𝘥 𝘰𝘯 𝘗𝘢𝘳𝘢𝘨𝘳𝘢𝘱𝘩 𝘮𝘢𝘳𝘬𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘶𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘤𝘳𝘦𝘵𝘪𝘯."

𝗠𝗲: "I think I'll nip to the shop and get a bag of crisps and a flapjack."

🧠 "𝘖𝘪, 𝘸𝘰𝘣𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘣𝘰𝘵𝘵𝘰𝘮. 𝘈𝘳𝘦𝘯'𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘳𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘭𝘰𝘴𝘦 𝘸𝘦𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵?"

Morning All
It's a touch frosty out there today.
#TZAG

Hey children. There never was any privacy on the Interwebs and for the vast majority there is no privacy and there never will be.

You are in an exclusive micro ecosystem if you know how to limit your footprint because pretty much everyone else couldn't care less.

If you have an ebay, Amazon or Big and Bouncey account we know who you are. 🤣