Notices by Michele Feltman Strider (michelestrider@mastodon.social)

Stolen but true

Please.

Someone.

Anyone.

Stick an icepick in my eye or whatever you have to do to stop my brain from incessantly repeating (to the tune of the 80s one-hit wonder) "Talarico... Suave."

This is not right or fair to any of us.

When you've hurt your knee, a cool thing to do is tuck it up under you when you're sitting, to be sure your entire body weight is on it. Hope this helps!

@fesshole This is why every woman over 40 in the American South calls everyone "honey" or "baby." Our power of recall went wherever our estrogen did.

@fesshole You're doing God's work, my friend

@fesshole *hands you my hand sanitizer*

Please wish this silly little cat a happy birthday

@fesshole You seem to have an extraordinary amount of free time on your hands

So, the Epstein files are "start a war with Iran" bad

@fesshole I need you to be my guru

@fesshole Dang fine passive aggression on her part. Her award will come in the mail.

@fesshole She knew, baby. She knew.

@fesshole A card for when you care enough to send the very meh-st

@fesshole But King Chuck needs your cash to commission more hellscape portraits of himself

Motion to rename ICE the Scared Boys. All in favor, boost.

I feel 2026 is the year I'm going to buy sweatpants and make hella use of them

@fesshole Gillian Anderson became the internet's first girlfriend while wearing giant 90s shoulder pads and spouting multi-syallabic words. I bow to her power.

I mistyped USPS as PSPS in my browser, and now 3 cats are out for delivery to my address

How to have the perfect relationship with your cat, in one easy step:

Do everything they want exactly when they want it.

@fesshole Throw in a kazoo for good measure