@lb1a I feel pretty much the same. I can also say that, more than the technical limitations, I also have ethical concerns with Matrix. But for me to be able to ditch worst things (like Whatsapp and stuff) I had to set up some bridges on Matrix a while ago. Wish I had done that on XMPP, but it would have taken much longer and I couldn't afford that.
Anyways, it seems PixelFed Dev Matrix channel is working, if you feel like giving it a try with no compromise. You can probably use Matrix.org's IRC bridges and feel nostalgic. I'm in there right now. #pixeldev:matrix.org