@matty @SuperLutheran I used to say similar. I honestly thought God made me to bleed. As I got older I realized it was a matter of not being able to see his plan. I lost everything once. My own faith was shaken. I was betrayed by my own church leaders inside of it. I felt my heart break. I thought I lost my faith but it was my attachment to men, to the world. Sometimes we don't know what we need. Each pain, I realize now, gives me an understand to truly touch ppls lives. Without that I couldn't understand faith or how to truly be there for ppl that need someone to hear them. Touching one life or heart is worth more than gold. Instead of seeing it has negatives, try to see the gifts those failures/pains have given you. He does reward us. Lighting a fire to clear a path we aren't able to see until it is ready.