@GalacticTurtle Wow, there’s a lot here, but what I had no idea about was this:
Amongst black women you’ve got some who make their whole personality about partnering with white men who they view will see them as human and treat them better than black men.
Is this because white men are sometimes less macho (maybe – that stereotypical, “progressive” type of white man, anyway)?
I wish your white friend the best with her “queer men and non-men.” 😅 I don’t know if these “non-men” are women, but it kind of sounds like she’s sick of men and doesn’t want to give up hope that there’s a different type out there.