@ForbiddenDreamer @Doll @Frank @f0x >refused to explain
a. he gay
b. he's a tragic victim of bullying. Someone, please help him! He's too scared even to tell doctors! He's bullied because he's gay!
c. he's too short for his pullup bar, so he stood on a barbell to get to it, then he did naked hanging leg raises but slipped and fell on the barbell ass-first, and then this happened because he's gay
d. he was working on a "Gay Crossfit" (because he's gay) with a special kind of WOD and like all scientists some of the experiments go badly
e. he took mushrooms and a demon granted him psychic powers but the powers only obey his deepest desires which, since he was gay, was a desire to put things in his butt. The trauma distracted him and saved his soul, but he's gay it's a wash isn't it
f. he lost a bet and he's gay
g. he has an enormous collection of thousands of medical pictures of objects in butts, which he enjoys very much because he's gay, and he noticed that the 'athletic equipment' section of the collection was smaller than he'd like
h. the dumbbell is actually the real guy - a gay metallic alien - and the human is a semi-autonomous meat puppet. The gay dumbbell's extensive research of gay porn gave him an unrealistic understanding of how easy it would be leave the meat puppet after his vacation on Earth was over