Conversation
Notices
-
Embed this notice
@SuperSnekFriend @Curvin @Nirty_Digger @SpergAnon @nobu @Some_German_Guy @William_The_Dragonborn >be first human who married a hellhound
>people think it's weird, whatever
>your first six kids happen within the first three months of marriage
>she claimed she was "on the pill"
>reality of it, she was taking fertility boosters
>she doesn't seem to mind at all
>you become a local phenomena, people still think your weird and your kids are weird
>half a year later, she's pregnant again
>bringing you to a total of thirteen kids
>you are a little bit worried, she's more than happy - neighbors make a few jokes at your expense, whatever
>your running ragged already in the first year of marriage
>second year comes around, your anniversity
>you think it's going to be a nice dinner out, and a date like how you used to do it before you were forcibly married to a hellhound
>she however - has something different planned
>you go to a movie and the moment it's over and your out of eyesight, she's all over you
>few days later, she's pregnant again
>god help you
>year three
>you have over twenty-five kids
>neighbors are constantly annoyed at you since your house is the most messy, and most chaotic in the block
>kids are running rampant
>wife constantly trying to rape you since she enjoys it
>your boss keeps making fun of your smell
>journalists want to ask questions since it's crazy someone can have this many kids in 2022
>these interviews are all mocking you and your family
>"how do you plan to send them to college / educate them / etc" is a common leading question they ask
>eventually you resolve to never talk to journalists again
>year five
>your household is like a barracks for hellhound toddlers, easily half a hundred of them are running around.
>the first of them are going to kindergarten
>in fact, they're around 40% of the entire kindergarten class that year
>school district begins asking questions and investigations begin into your family life to make sure you've been treating them well, etc etc
>homeowner's association has been trying to kick you out for years
>house had to have multiple extensions
>you've been fired, but the government gives you so much money for taking care of the kids, you can stay at home and not stress too much
>wife has no intent on slowing down at all
is this too many
- johnbudd1350 likes this.
- johnbudd1350 repeated this.
-
Embed this notice
@hikari @SuperSnekFriend @Curvin @Nirty_Digger @Some_German_Guy @SpergAnon @Tactical @William_The_Dragonborn @nobu NOT IF YOU CONVERT THEM INTO CHRISTIANITY YOU DON'T
-
Embed this notice
@Tactical @Curvin @Nirty_Digger @SpergAnon @nobu @Some_German_Guy @William_The_Dragonborn NO! ? ? ?
-
Embed this notice
@SuperSnekFriend @Curvin @Nirty_Digger @Some_German_Guy @SpergAnon @Tactical @William_The_Dragonborn @nobu >fucking demon puppies
That's how you get monkepox AND eternal damnation
-
Embed this notice
@SuperSnekFriend @Curvin @Nirty_Digger @SpergAnon @nobu @Some_German_Guy @William_The_Dragonborn >year 9
>your wife celebrates going into the triple-digits by baking (multiple) delicious carrot cakes for you and the kids
>your small compound of hellhound kids has had to put up a thick stone wall to prevent kids from venturing out of the block
>games of tag and sports often descend into small mini riots in the neighborhood
>local kids come from around the town to hang out at your house's block though, since there's always something going on
>you basically have to run an authoritarian dictatorship to make sure your kids aren't staying up late playing video games, reading, whatever
>but frankly the hugs once you get home from anywhere in town like the grocery store are worth it
>your kids alone basically take up around 30% of the school's occupancy
>wife makes the radical proposition to start homeschooling them
>you explain to her that there's barely enough time to do it, and she pouts
>"I can just call my sister over, she's a teacher y'know."
>by the end of the month there's a now a small elementary for your kids set up by your wife's sister, who also enrolls her dozen or so kids into the class
>year 12
>wife has finally calmed down on having kids
>approximately 5% of the town is now hellhound / minority
>you have single-handidly caused demographic change
>there is an entire school system dedicated for your kids
>hellhound wife has taken up gardening as a relaxing side hobby
>the kids undermine her at every turn but she doesn't seem to mind
>however, the worst case scenario happens
>one day your oldest daughter comes home and asks for dating advice about a cute boy at the human school
>this surely won't end badly
>year 16
>there is now a literal pack of ravenous high school hellhounds literally lurking outside of the human high school
>there's been a siege for two days as your oldest daughters apparently want a cute human boyfriend
>the police are threatening to arrest them for stalking
>parents are upset
>everyone is mad
>wife is busy gardening and just tells them dating advice / how to kidnap a man like you
>the high school dating scene, once previously full of disaster and horror, is now dominated by a clique of lovey-dovey hellhound teenagers
>movie theaters and cinema make a comeback
>there's actual kids at the parks again
>the town is looking better than ever
>maybe this isn't too bad after all
>year 16.9
>prom night has ended in absolute disaster
>you have been receving loads of angry phonecalls from angry parents
>apparently one of your daughters got proposed to by a young man and everything went out of control
>you are now the clan patriarch
-
Embed this notice
@Tactical @Curvin @Nirty_Digger @SpergAnon @nobu @Some_German_Guy @William_The_Dragonborn I hope this can be me one day. :02sad:
Tactical :njp: ?? ?? ?
Roadie Yukari :4chan:
?uper?nekFriend ?
Platinum
All GNU social JP content and data are available under the