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@sophieschmieg @quintessence @aud @mekkaokereke there's a kind of power in victimhood, psychologically speaking.

You get to leverage your victim status to get some benefits. You get sympathy from others. You're not to blame, even if you're part of the problem. And you don't have to change anything and take responsibility.

It can be a cozy place!

Getting rid of the "weak woman, evil man" narrative was quite a bit of psychological work for myself.