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   eris (eris@akko.disqordia.space)'s status on Sunday, 12-Nov-2023 19:19:12 JST eris
   I really need to work through my mental blockages that prevent me from just admitting to being a lesbian tbh
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     eris (eris@akko.disqordia.space)'s status on Sunday, 12-Nov-2023 19:31:47 JST eris

     in reply to

     • ??? 妛彁 :xf_nyxsigil: :xf_nyxdisapproving:
     @nyx idk how to really articulate it. I alienate myself from women in general because it's painful to have to face being vulnerable with them. Something that just feels like having the skin ripped off of me and I'm left a fleshy anxious mess unable to be what they need.
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     ??? 妛彁 :xf_nyxsigil: :xf_nyxdisapproving: (nyx@social.xenofem.me)'s status on Sunday, 12-Nov-2023 19:31:48 JST ??? 妛彁 :xf_nyxsigil: :xf_nyxdisapproving:

     in reply to
     @eris it feels like you really flip back and forth on this matter
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     ??? 妛彁 :xf_nyxsigil: :xf_nyxdisapproving: (nyx@social.xenofem.me)'s status on Sunday, 12-Nov-2023 19:38:08 JST ??? 妛彁 :xf_nyxsigil: :xf_nyxdisapproving:

     in reply to
     @eris I mean this is consistent with having a mental block about how you describe your sexuality but I meant that it doesn't seem really like you aren't not attracted to men also, unless that's part of the blockage, if it's like, a comphet thing or what. if that's the case it's pretty convincing
     eris likes this.
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     eris (eris@akko.disqordia.space)'s status on Sunday, 12-Nov-2023 19:44:53 JST eris

     in reply to

     • ??? 妛彁 :xf_nyxsigil: :xf_nyxdisapproving:
     @nyx I'm attracted to men yes but I don't think my sanity can handle continuing to try with them.
     
     When I was a guy I could get in their head somewhat and understand them but even then it was lacking. Had nothing to do with feminine or masculine or the genitals, just at the end of the day they were always spiritually unfulfilling or damaging.
     
     I went as far as meeting my male twin flame and he was the most toxic shell of a person I've ever met, barely clinging onto reality.
     
     Idk what my female twin flame could be. But I feel like I do myself a disservice by shutting her out.
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     ??? 妛彁 :xf_nyxsigil: :xf_nyxdisapproving: (nyx@social.xenofem.me)'s status on Sunday, 12-Nov-2023 20:02:36 JST ??? 妛彁 :xf_nyxsigil: :xf_nyxdisapproving:

     in reply to
     @eris mm yes that makes sense. it sounds like it would probably be better for you to exclusively date like, non-men
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     ᚛ᚉᚈᚅ᚜ (kittenlikeasmallcat@social.xenofem.me)'s status on Sunday, 12-Nov-2023 23:06:57 JST ᚛ᚉᚈᚅ᚜

     in reply to

     • ??? 妛彁 :xf_nyxsigil: :xf_nyxdisapproving:

     @eris @nyx Might go without saying that I know a good number of women and butch lesbians in particular and who embody attributes that fit this description in precisely the way one might find men attractive, but without all the soul flaying hell torment bastard shit. Speaking for myself I’ve fucked a lot of guys, and dated a few, and found myself attracted to some features that happen to belong to particular men. It feels intuitive to me that this all coalesces and resolves neatly into me being a full bore all the way raging lesbian. Anything attractive about men is way more appealing in women IMO.

     eris likes this.