Notices by Plagued By Concepts ​:puzzle:​ :ffxiv_drk: (firstprogenitor@sanguinem.space), page 2

i did 100% the bestiary tho. which honestly was pushing it

this game took me like 10 hours longer to beat than ff1 somehow

WAIT I JUST BEAT THE EMPEROR IN TWO TURNS. HELLO? HELLO????? TWO TURNS????? I WAS LIKE OH PHASE 2 ALREADY! BUT NO??????? I BEAT HIM????????????????

im really pissed off bc not only did i miss 5 chests i also somehow didnt learn all the passwords. what?????

i got this at least which im pretty proud of

things i have been told are beautiful:
- the shape of my teeth (multiple dentists)
- my veins (multiple phlebotomists)
- my organs (sonographer)

@funkula @Aleums theres another poem by this woman that I didn't post specifically because I found it too disturbing and would ruin the vibe but it's about getting sexually assaulted during a sleepover but within the entirety of the poem the man is referred to literally as a dog. Like she refers to his paws and shit. Sufficed to say I'm at least 80% sure this is a woman with a very fraught relationship to sex and uh maybe dogs

You all need to see this immediately

@Aleums never been done before

Okay yea I'm going to the ER

Finally gave me some morphine lol

iv bag is cold and it's making me shiver

Okay so since I'm feeling a little more coherent: for some reason when I woke up from a nap at 10:30 pm my chest was hurting. It felt like binder pain so I tried to pop some Tylenol and wait for it to go away. But instead it got worse. I took a shower and it helped but then I felt worse again. I canceled raid and tried to get more sleep but When I woke up I felt really, really bad. So I called into work and went to the ER. My blood pressure was very low (like 50/40) and my body temp was also very low (like 97.1) so they triggered an emergency and took an EKG and a bunch of other bullshit. Sufficed to say my blood pressure was largely due to my POTS mixed with the fact that I haven't eaten very much in the past 5 hours made my blood pressure plummet. I wasn't having a heart attack or anything. Doctor thinks it's probably an inflamed rib tendon or something like that. Fluids have helped a lot but the pain was starting to come back after the IV ran out but they just gave me some morphine so I should be okay for a bit. But I don't think I'm in any life threatening situation. They already did an X-ray and didn't find anything

Update: From some cursory googling I thought I had sprained my diaphragm or something to that effect, but the doctors now believe I have Cholecystitis (infection of the gallbladder basically) and they want to treat me as well as give me get an MRI (the MRI is bc they detected a growth in my liver, but they think it's benign. They want to double check though.) They're admitting me to the hospital and the doctor said I would probably be there for "at least a few days." I am mostly annoyed at having to be in a fucking hospital bed for a few days but I'll live I guess

They had to take a lot of fucking blood for a blood culture but they still refuse to tell me if I can eat food. I'm so mad about it lol

I just keep getting madder and madder I pinged the stupid thing to ask my nurse AGAIN if I can eat anything and not only did she not respond, my antibiotics finished and have been rapidly beeping for 5 minutes and no one has come to make it stop. Why give me a button to call a nurse if they're not going to come and why make the antibiotic beep when it's done if you're not going to come and shut it off

Update: I'm doing okay. They transferred me to the emergency observation center while they wait for a bed to open up in the actual hospital. I think the morphine has worn off but I'm not in any pain. They still haven't told me if I can fucking eat. I'm starting to feel dizzy from giving like a pint of blood at least with no food in the past 10 hours. The nurse or of course doing her best but why can't these doctors just ANSWER THE FUCKING QUESTION

I called the nurse and a nurse that is not my nurse came in and kept telling me "this is the ER everyone is uncomfortable" and "this is the ER the doctors are very busy" Shut the fuck up. I didn't call you in here to be patronized

I think a lot of people don't really get me or why I do and say the things I do and it makes them make wild assumptions about the things I think and believe and it feels kind of bad. And this is also unfortunate in an internet culture where your perceived opinions on things determines basically your entire social standing

Like, I think a lot of people want to feel important and heard and use posting as a way of feeling that way. But I don't really do that. I use this account as basically my safe space to scream into the void. I ramble ideas or complain, bitch, and moan so that I don't do it in places where people who don't know me can actually see it. Of course a lot of the shit I say is going to read like half baked. Because I'm basically talking to myself, writing thoughts as I come up with them