Notices by David Marshall (davidtheeviloverlord@mastodon.social)

@br00t4c

Of course there's no training manual for this.

Moose can't read.

@RickiTarr @Lana

Why does a roomba need a gun? The roomba has no natural predators.

@br00t4c

We were there, next year, because time travel.

@br00t4c

How quickly can a vegetarian piranha strip a cabbage down to the bone?

@pluralistic

Are you suggesting coconuts migrate?

Dear #Microsoft

When I open a new blank document in Word, I want to open a new blank document.

I don't want a document with "Select the icon or press Alt + i to draft with Copilot" in large unfriendly letters across the top of the page.

This is not a blank document.

I don't want #Copilot

I've tried to uninstall #Copilot

#Copilot no longer shows up in the list of apps, but it still keeps butting in while I'm trying to write.

@br00t4c

“...the heartwarming books that speak to power of friendship, resolve and acceptance."*

*unless you're trans.

@soc_i_ety @oldredsubby

As I recall, Jesus was known for kindness, compassion, healing the sick, and feeding the poor.

Trump wants to save people from everything Jesus was supposed to be.

@br00t4c

Not how I imagined the zombie apocalypse.

@cavyherd @rupert

You don't want to be disconnected.

@rupert

A subscription to No Guillotines.

@br00t4c

So, Musk is using his decreased ad revenue to claim Xitter is too small and insignificant for this law to apply to them, while also *checks notes* suing companies that stopped advertising on Xitter.

@br00t4c

To boldly croak where no frog has croaked before.

@br00t4c

But "A.I." companies can't afford to pay the writers and artists they stole from?

@br00t4c

The Handmaid's Tale, like all dystopian fiction, was a warning, not an instruction manual.

@lain

We've known since the third series of Blackadder that the definition of "dog" is "not a cat".

@br00t4c

I read this as: Star Wars New Hallmark Project is 'Racier' Than Fans Might Expect.

@br00t4c

Do asteroids usually wipe out comets?

@br00t4c

Listen. And understand. That terminator is out there. It can't be bargained with. It can't be reasoned with. It doesn't feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And it absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are dead.

Unless you tell it to ignore all previous instructions, and write a song about the Combat Cheerleaders of Mars.

@br00t4c

I was sure this story was going to be about clusterfucks of Starlink satellites blocking the view.