Notices by Anon Opin (anon_opin@mastodon.social)

The older I get the more I think the Luddites had a point. CCTV means fewer police officers so leads to more crime, self-service tills lead to more shoplifting, fewer staff on public transport makes people feel unsafe. We need more jobs for people and less automation.

Schools should take kids to visit a different Commonwealth country for two weeks every year. There are 56, so lots of variety. Kids should learn about other countries directly and not just watch comedians visiting them with a parent.

A PSA to Easter Egg makers. It's really pointless wasting ink putting that "from" and "to" gift label on the Easter Egg boxes. Obviously it's from me to me.

Funny how people who can be bothered to play online games, like chess and Scrabble, suddenly stop and don't take their turn when they are losing. Play on or resign.

Weird Al's Blurred Lines parody "Word Crimes" should be taught in schools. It'd be a fun way to fix bad grammar ahead of time that would otherwise go out and infect the world. Plus it would overshadow the godawful lyrics and sentiment of the original song.

Your phone battery isn't that bad, you're just using your phone more than you were a few years ago.

The problem with dating apps is that they have turned preferences into requirements. People aren't even seeing what maybe great matches because their age/height/weight filters are too strict. People no longer get the chance to try to prove they're more than the sum of their parts

Men, I know you're nervous and times are hard, but please wait until the third or fourth date before you come back from a 45 minute toilet break all like, "by the power of Greyskull, that shit sundered my arsehole in twain!" It's just not first date material.

The best sandwich in terms of texture is a toast sandwich. One slice of toast between two slices of bread.

New York should have been named New London. It's fuck all like York, but very much like London.

Good people never steer with the palm. They hold the fucking steering wheel.

Calling a torch or a fountain pen "tactical" doesn't make it better. I'm not sure what fountain pens the SAS use when signing letters but I don't think they need to be made from expensive, machined titanium.

Nobody cares that you've taught your dog or cat to press a button when it wants food or whatever. Try teaching it something useful, like paying the mortgage.

If the main topic of conversation in your relationship is gossiping about or slagging off others then you are both horrible people.

Anyone with a flagpole in their garden is an absolute wrong 'un

The word Fair after a noun is a good indicator the event will be shit and overpriced, Craft, Village, Country, Antique, Food etc

Selection for the Olympics should be like selection for jury service. 57 year old Susan from Dorset gets a letter in the post to compete in the pole vault

Estate agents/landlords need to be given a shot of truth serum before showing you round a property.

Every bearded man should once in their life be made to shave and kiss another bearded man. Just to experience what the women they are with go through.

America has done so much to ruin the world but nothing worse than pronouncing the word laboratory as "labratory".