Notices by Tattie (tattie@eldritch.cafe)

@mycrowgirl

The absolute certainty that nobody with tits could possibly like or know anything about whisky was breathtaking.

With a face like she'd been sucking lemons for the last three months.

@goatsarah bland meat in a bland carbohydrate. It can only really be rescued by serious amounts of hot sauce.

@halotroop2288 then she has picked her side. But there are a vast amount of cis women, especially in the UK, who think of themselves as feminist but "don't know what to think" about trans rights.

If they don't figure it out soon, they'll be scratching their heads as to how they lost their rights, when all they did was stay silent as the forces of fascism targeted their political dialogue at trans people.

@BugFajita is this Jólaköttur?
https://www.atlasobscura.com/articles/yule-cat-jolakotturinn-iceland

Reminder to all feminists

If you accept trans people being defined by their reproductive role...
Then men can define all woman by their reproductive role

If you accept that trans teenagers are too young to make decisions about their bodies...
Then men can decide teenage girls are too young to make decisions about their bodies

If you accept medical gatekeeping of trans people's access to hormones...
Then doctors can restrict any woman's access to HRT and birth control

If you accept stripping trans people of legal protections...
Then men can strip women of legal protections

This is the truth of "trans rights are human rights"
Regardless of your personal feelings on whether trans people are "really" the gender they say they are, the exact same human rights protecting us also underlie women's liberation-- bodily autonomy, dignity, equality of opportunity, and protection from harm.
And so many men are desperate for those rights to disappear.

@RickiTarr it's terrifying whenever a video game comes out with a female main character, incels will be screaming into every comment section they can get their keyboards on "I will be cheering for this to fail!" They review-bomb the game, they harass the people who made it, they create fake screenshots and rumours to make it look bad, they try to kill it in every way they can.

And they call themselves "video game fans". 🙃 They don't seem to like the medium at all, or at least not nearly as much as they love hating women.

"Why don't I ever see TMEs talking about transmisogyny?"

Oh, I dunno, maybe because reducing trans men and transmasculine folks to a dehumanising three letter initialism like fucking TERFs do means that not many of them actually want to speak to you?

Because the trans guys I know and follow are painfully aware of transmisogyny, and talk about it way more than I ever do. I see transmascs tying themselves in knots trying not to offend brittle transfems as they speak about their own experiences and battles.

Crying about "the invisibility of transmisogyny" the minute the trans community dares to talk about transmasc or enby issues is really telling about how you expect the narrative to always and only centre you.

I want to stop hearing bickering about who has it fucking worst. I want to hear trans stories whatever gender you were assigned at birth, however you identify now, whatever other privileges or oppressions you have. I want to see things from so many different trans viewpoints.

Listening to someone else's story is not fucking oppression.

Rant ends.

"To save costs, we could replace our wine tasters with AI"
"But... how would that work? AIs can't taste things."
"It doesn't matter! Human wine tasters have written reams on similar wines, all the AI has to do is to extrapolate."
"But... we'd be lying to our customers. The point of a wine tasting is that something is tasted. The AI cannot in any sense of the word experience the wine it's purporting to know about. We'd just be underhandedly copying humans who are doing the actual job."
"And all that is different to any other use of AI how, exactly?"

@broadwaybabyto "well of course I personally am not the problem", I told myself. "Why, if I ever encountered a rapist..." I imagined myself meting out violence for violence.

The men around me would echo such sentiments. Rape was an unthinkably horrific crime, we told each other, and it was unthinkable that any of us would commit it.

It wasn't until many years later that a friend told me that she had been raped. By a man who at one point I had counted as one of my best friends.

It was easy to believe her. By the time she told me this, he had devolved into a visibly horrible person, an anti-feminist incel with a bitter streak a mile wide. I'd blocked him ages ago on all social media.

But back then, what were the signs? A "dark sense of humour" that came out when he'd had a few pints. A suspiciously young girlfriend. And a slowly increasing list of women who would refuse to be at the same parties as him.

I enabled this asshole. I put in good words for him, told people he was "trying to be better". My naive, well-meaning awkwardness he used as camouflage for his ill intent.

I was the problem, after all. Exactly because rape was unthinkable to me.

Here is the sobering truth: there is no social group in which women and people of marginalised genders do not have to worry about rapists. Guys, if you want to be part of the solution and not the problem, match their vigilance with your own. Think the unthinkable.

@babe this is Misty, doing a good line in "when will my true love return from the war?"

@geekylou ok so this is interesting, if it isn't a coincidence: JKR and Glinner both have history of first being criticised from the right. JKR for "promoting witchcraft", Glinner for "mocking the church".

It's almost as if they fell into a trap of thinking "well, at least the left will support me no matter what I do", and then when they actually get (correctly) criticised from the left, they feel betrayed. And not coincidentally, a lot of their cope seems to be strawmanning their critics to make it sound like right wing rather than left wing criticism.
@goatsarah

Trans ppl I love you all ❤️ :heart_transgender: 💚

@Impossible_PhD I train with bladed weapons (well, blunt ones) every week, and the thought of using them in self-defense is fucking stupid. Like what's the plan here? You get jumped and then expect to have a minute to pull a knife out of your bag? Or walk around with one in your hand whenever you feel unsafe, thus pre-escalating any confrontation? A knife is an offensive weapon, not a defensive one. They only get more people hurt.

No, your first plan should always be to de-escalate and defuse the situation. Keep your hands low, make it clear you're not interested in a fight. Don't brandish anything at anyone.

Your second plan, if you can, is to run. Keep an eye on your escape routes, don't let people back you into a corner.

Only after both those options are exhausted should you turn to fighting. And the only "weapon" I'd recommend is a good stout umbrella. It's not perceived as a weapon, meaning you can still de-escalate with one in your hand. You can give someone a swift knock in the jaw or round the head to daze them, or you knock the knife out of their hand, and then you run.

Self-defense is about getting away safely, not escalating a confrontation into a fight.

Reactionaries:

• deeply terrified of the "woke mind virus"
• go out of their way to catch actual viruses, because "they have an immune system"

@subbak @augmentedrobot done!

I can't believe the pack instructions only say to boil the gnocchi. Why would you deny yourself this? #food

This whole discourse of course also erases those who identify neither as transmasc nor transfem, who don't fit into this symmetry at all, and whose experiences can be all over the place. The trans experience is far more complex and variable than even most trans people credit it as.

There's a phenomenon that causes transmasc and transfem discourse to sometimes rub up against each other, and that's something I'd like to label false symmetry. This is basically the premise that since we're going in "opposite gender directions" our experiences must somehow be opposite.

There's a popular oversimplification I see going round a lot that says that due to societal misogyny, feminine is seen as the worst thing a boy can be, whereas masculine traits in girls are lauded. Too many transfems see this and assume therefore that transmasc childhoods are so much easier than theirs, with every departure from femininity laughed off with a gentle "oh she's such a tomboy".

No. Listen to actual transmasc experiences.

I've also seen transmasc folks talk about being silenced, talked over, threatened for being a "girl", as if it were a completely alien experience to transfems. Again, no. My friends, that was something I very much experienced as well.

It shouldn't be that big a leap to understand that childhood is pretty shit for any trans person. But oh! The draw of symmetry.

Similarly, our presents, our futures. Transfems feel keenly how misogyny crystallises against us as we transition. We see how we are barged past and patronised and stared, a far more immediate and automatic misogyny than we're accustomed to. And we sometimes presume that our transmasc friends are "transitioning into privilege", gaining the immediate respect that we're losing.

And, like, maybe there's some experiences that correlate to that expectation? But I see many more transmascs transitioning to visibly queer, soft-spoken guys that aren't rewarded with freely-given masculine respect.

The term that leads to the stickiest arguments is that of "female socialisation", which many transmascs vibe with as a description of how they were (and continue to be) policed. But! So many transfems bristle at this because of the fear of being branded "male-socialised" by symmetry, which let's be clear is a term which TERFs have absolutely claimed as their own by now, as a weapon to silence us.

I reject the false symmetry. I accept that many of my transmasc friends feel they were female socialised. I personally feel I was socialised as a weird genderless creature that was only celebrated for its academic achievements and told to shut up in any other sphere of life. 🤷♀️

Because gender isn't symmetrical, actually, and privileges are only awarded to a subset of men who can actually perform masculinity "right". And we are all on strange and complicated journeys where we're perceived as female, male, neither or both, and policed in contradictory and ever-shifting ways. In that way our experiences are far more similar than we are opposite.

Ope.