MY DAD, DDDD, IS IN TOWN. HE'S BEEN VERY CRITICAL OF MY DECISION TO NOT IMMEDIATELY VAPORIZE YOU ALL, HE COMPLAINS ABOUT HIS GOUT, AND HE CALLS HUMAN GHOSTWRITER "PORK CHOP." HE IS A GREAT OMICRONIAN.
LIVING YOUR WHOLE LIFE AND DYING ONLY TO DISCOVER THAT YOU WERE IN A RITUAL ORACULAR TRANCE AND NOW EVERYONE IN YOUR VILLAGE WANTS TO INTERROGATE YOU ABOUT THE WORLD TO COME.
@mivox OOC: I also joked about using the laser to kill God to free the galaxy from guilt and sin, which struck me as more of a Catholic problem. And Catholicism did enough to me that I'm pretty happy with killing its god. Maybe that's it. But I assumed that the objection was based on MTG and her actually anti-semitic Jewish Space Laser conspiracy.
Ooc: Human Ghostwriter here. When I joke around as Lrrr, I ask myself, "whose feelings might this joke hurt?" If the answer is people who reflexively hate all caps or loosely Futurama-inspired jokes from the perspective of a minor villain, people who think joking about killing and eating people is bad, or right-wingers, I joke even harder. But sometimes, my conscience creeps in. [EDIT for clarity: I do not aim to punch down. The joy of playing as an alien heel is that I can be readily dismissive of and openly hostile to the privileges that make life so intolerably unfair. Oh, you have laws and needs and bones? Tough. I want a laser and I will eat whoever I need to until I get my laser]. Lrrr making a mutual aid request for $2 trillion is so absurd that I couldn't conceive of it as punching down. It simultaneously makes fun of the bad people who abuse mutual aid requests and the military-industrial complex while making Lrrr look like a ridiculous idiot who doesn't understand how human things work. And, he gets to tease the joys of wild impossible science fiction nonsense. It's great.
Some people disagreed. Upon some reflection, I broke the hashtag to mutual aid. The people who care about it *really* care. If it works for them, fine. I'll get out of the sandbox. I am not here to poke fun of mutual aid itself. I don't think I did, but if we're having that debate I'm already not having any fun.
Others decided that this was textbook anti-semitism. From what textbook, I don't know. The closest I can figure is that some people have decided that Marge Greene ruined lasers forever for everyone. Respectfully, as a lover of the aesthetics of science fiction and loather of everything that the congresswoman from Georgia has ever done or been associated with, MTG does not get to take lasers away from all of us for all purposes forever. I do not credit this criticism, as I consider it unmoored from reality.
So, who does advocating for $2 trillion to build a laser capable of blowing up the moon, Mercury, and Gliese-581C hurt?
- anyone who lives within 100 miles of the laser construction site. If you live in Northeast Ohio, go ahead and get mad. - Surfers. That's fair. Not having a moon would directly impact your deal. - Buzz Aldrin. He's allowed to kill me over this. I can live with that. - Werewolves, although I feel like blowing up the moon would free them from a terrible curse and ultimately inure to their benefit. - Mooninites, pretty obviously. I will deal with Err and Ignignokt. - people who are really into astrology. If this annoys you, I will learn to live with myself - I understand that Mercury going into retrograde plays some role as a moose in Cree mythology. That's objectively cool, and I had forgotten about that. Don't worry, I don't think we're actually gonna get funding. - the filthy barbarian monsters who stand for everything we hate and against everything we love on Gliese-581C. At least, Lrrr tells me that's what they're like.
Having gone through this process, I still feel pretty good about the concept. If you think I got it wrong, you may disagree with a stranger on the internet.
BEFORE THIS GETS REALLY NOT CONSTRUCTIVE OR EDIFYING:
LIEBERMAN SINGLE-HANDEDLY KILLED THE PUBLIC OPTION IN THE ACA, LOUDLY AMPLIFIED LIES ABOUT WMDS IN THE LEAD UP TO THE IRAQ WAR, HE BROKE WITH DEMS TO LIMIT PUNITIVE DAMAGES AWARDS IN PRODUCTS LIABILITY CASES AND SERIOUSLY LIMIT THE AVAILABILITY OF CLASS ACTION LAWSUITS, CHAMPIONED THE DEATH PENALTY, SUPPORTED NO CHILD LEFT BEHIND, AND THREATENED TO QUIT THE DEMOCRATIC PARTY IF IT TRIED TO LIMIT THE WAR IN IRAQ (WHICH WOULD HAVE MADE CHENEY THE TIEBREAKING VOTE IN THE SENATE).
ALLIES ARE INHERENTLY UNRELIABLE. THEIR INTERESTS ARE, AT BEST, CONDITIONALLY ALIGNED WITH YOURS. THE WHITE MODERATES WITH THE "LOVE IS LOVE" YARD SIGNS LIKE MY TOOTS, BUT WHEN IT COMES TIME TO BUILD MY LASER, WHERE WILL THEY BE? WILL THEY STRIP THE COPPER OUT OF THEIR HOMES TO FACILITATE CONSTRUCTION? OR WILL THEY ABANDON ME IN MY HOUR OF NEED?
I'M NOT PERFECT, BUT FROM WHERE I SIT, THE RICH AND POWERFUL OF EARTH ARE THE ONES STANDING BETWEEN ME AND MY GLORIOUS DEATH RAY. I ABHOR INTRA-SPECIES INEQUALITY AND PROMISE TO USE THE AWESOME, TERRIBLE POWER OF MY GIGANTIC LASER TO TEAR DOWN THE DIVISIONS THAT IMMISERATE AND SUBJUGATE SO MANY ON YOUR PLANET. YOU WILL ALL WEAR THE OMICRONIAN YOKE AND BEAR THE SAME BURDENS.
OR HAS MY TERRIFYING ODOR AND REPUTATION FOR BRUTALLY RIPPING OFF THE LIMBS OF ANYONE I CAN SEIZE INSULATED ME FROM THE CESSPOOL OF MEDIOCRITY IN WHICH, CHIN-DEEP, THE REST OF YOU MUST WADE?
HAS ANYONE ELSE NOTICED AN UPTICK IN CLASSIC MASTODON H.O.A. BEHAVIOR POLICING? I WAS SAILING SMOOTHLY FOR MONTHS AND THEN GOT SOME "OH, SURELY YOU MEANT TO PUT A CONTENT WARNING ON YOUR ALL-CAPS TOOTS [I.E., ALL OF THEM] TO PROTECT VULNERABLE PEOPLE" REPLY GUYS FROM OUT OF NOWHERE. I'VE ALSO SEEN TUT-TUTTING ABOUT ADDING HASHTAGS TO INCREASE REACH, WHICH FEELS LIKE A WEIRD TWITTERISM TO ME.
@HamonWry I WENT BACK TO THE ZUCKERVERSE FOR A DAY. SOMEONE CALLED ME A LINGUISTIC PRESCRIPTIVIST AND TOLD ME TO KILL MYSELF BECAUSE I ARGUED THAT ALASKA IS PART OF THE CONTINENTAL U.S. IT WAS A GEOGRAPHY TRIVIA MEME. I MEAN, I... WHUH.
I AM LRRR, FUTURE CONQUEROR OF YOUR PLANET. STRANDED IN AMERICA SINCE 2023. OMICRON MALE. KEYNOTE SPEAKER. PUBLIC INTELLECTUAL. HE/HIM. TRAHR. BLM. HEEL. BELOVED MICRO-CELEBRITY. CONNECTIONS TO FUTURAMA CANON ARE TENUOUS AT BEST. I DO ALL-CAPS AND CARTOON VIOLENCE AND YOU CANNOT CHANGE ME. I AM UNHINGED.NOT AN OFFICIAL ACCOUNT FOR ANYTHING. DON'T LISTEN TO ME.TOOTS POSTED BY MY HUMAN GHOSTWRITER AGAINST HIS WILL.I'M LIKE IF CALVIN'S DAD HAD A BLOODTHIRSTY IMAGINARY ALIEN MONSTER HOBBES.