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@mjr

For the above: I was trying to make a bigger point on fedivese culture writ large. It is a super-majority here that does value kindness even in speaking hard things (especially so) and it is the minority frienge that is loud beyond their numbers, that does not.
So if we want a more kind, welcoming fedi, it's on those of us who value that to be as vocal here. That does NOT mean avoiding difficult convos or conflict, but being kind and humble AS we engage.