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@siege oh that's not really it, I think a big part of it was how when I was in like 2nd or 3rd grade my English teacher started talking about how clowns are tragic people who are ostracized from society and forced to perform this character who has to be silly all the time and that just stuck with me and makes me uncomfortable every time I see a clown 💀

I don't even know if it's true but the idea of it just makes me sad and angry and I don't like thinking about it