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The transgender movement isn't going to provide you with any of those things. That's the problem.
It sounds like you need a better economy and government, not hormone treatment or the ability to bully and ostracize people for having a minor disagreement with you.
> what difference does self-ID make?
Women getting raped in prison because a rapist said "lol I'm a woman now" and signed a piece of paper that makes him so under the law so he had to be transferred to a women's prison.
Yes, this actually happened multiple times already. (Sometimes it happens even though the law doesn't require it, because the people in charge decide to be "ahead of the law" in how progressive they are.)
That's just one extreme example. There's tons of ways in which it hurts women's rights and gay rights. Listen to the so-called "TERFs" and you'll learn.