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@ryanc From my outsider cis perspective, it's because your online persona is well defined, but when meeting you (or any non binary person) in person for the first time, there's a bit of awkwardness due to the lack of information (do we say "sir", "ma'am", will this hurt them if we choose wrong?). In my case I'd be very reluctant to ask, but I'm also the kind of person who's known people for years without knowing their first name and too afraid to ask too