i think you are also hitting on something i've been thinking lately ::
i'm not sure if i believe in "transformative" justice because i'm not sure i believe in abusers ability to change. and, even if they could, i'm not sure their needs should be centered in all this.
i think if the goal is "self-defense for the victims" & not "transform" or "punish" the abuser .... that actually is a CRUCIAL frame shift, because it centers the hurt person, who SHOULD be centered.
eg. we should be RESTORING the survivor's power, safety, material goods..... not RESTORING the abuser's reputation.