@SlicerDicer I know it is hard. I've been there myself. It got to the point where I was caughing up black shit and blood daily.
However it was the best decision of my life. Probably the reason why I am still alive today.
Things will get better. Believe in yourself and rise above your addictive tendencies. Don't replace one vice for another either.
Instead when you get the urge to smoke do something instead that positively impacts your life. Whatever that means to you.
You got this.