timberwraith
"Reeves does not believe that masculinity is toxic. But he does believe it’s fragile."
That's not an either/or situation. It's a both/and situation.
This is the point at which I stopped reading an article about some guy who is the latest grifter to hop aboard the "Boys/men are having a crisis!" think piece, publishing, and self-help gravy train that is revisited nearly every decade. 🙄
timberwraith
Richard V. Reeves is the latest "What about the menz?" guru to pop up and he has become popular with certain parts of the liberal bloviator-sphere.
Luna Rood
@timberwraith Yeah, the irony of the whole "men's issues" thing, is that they're overwhelmingly caused *by* patriarchy and misogyny.
They just don't want to reason a single layer deeper, which would reveal that the thing they are upholding in supposed furtherance of their interests, is in fact *the very thing* that is causing the issues *they* are complaining about.
timberwraith
I will give a non-subtle "hint" as to what I'd want to see in a crisis of masculinity "guru" who pops into the media spotlight:
I want to see someone who takes a no-bullshit approach to one of the primary reasons why masculinity so often goes toward the toxic:
Because boys/men are socially trained from day 0 to adulthood to center dominance over others and violence as core components of their identities as male people.
Start there. So much horror flows outward from that flawed basis of self.
timberwraith
There is a ton of social complexity that builds upon that flawed foundational "building block" of male self-hood. A lot.
But I see few people in the media spotlight who are honest about this.
And I don't expect to see that level of honesty because people are too chickenshit to go near the truth.
timberwraith
And unless people *seriously* confront the fact that patriarchal society inculcates boys/men to center their sense of self and social standing upon an ability to wield dominance over others and wield violence over others, there is no chance that we can effectively confront and dismantle what is toxic in so much of masculinity.
If you aren't willing to start *there*, the rest of what you do will be meaningless, ineffectual bullshit.
timberwraith
But people aren't willing to start there because that would mean dismantling how society trains boys/men to ascend into positions of power in patriarchal society.
It would challenge the genesis of that power at its root, on a developmental basis.
And that shakes up the system too hard.
timberwraith
No, I am not interested in the "what about the menz" guy.
I did read about guy just now in an extensive article in a liberal/left publication that sung accolades about him.
That was enough for me.
If you don't get why that key statement I quoted was a turn off, I can't help you.
timberwraith
But I do, from time to time, read an article about "men's issues" in lefty publications if I think maybe, just maybe, the article might get something right.
I'm usually disappointed in what I read.
I was, once again, disappointed in what I read.
timberwraith
But I do take an interest from time to time in "men's issues" surrounding gender and the construction of masculinity.
a) Because I like to keep tabs on the group of people who abused the fuck out of me when I was a kid.
b) I understand a metric fuck ton of what is toxic about masculinity because cis society tried to force that garbage on me when I was a kid, when society was trying to force boy-ness upon me.
timberwraith
I understand A LOT more than people might realize. Because of all of that brainwashing bullshit.
And I'm usually not impressed with the latest gifter dude who pops up with a supposed solution to the latest "crisis of masculinity."
They never seem to get it right.
I'm still waiting...
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