Here’s all my controversial opinions about video games in one post.
First let’s start with Nintendo:
- Nintendo didn’t “save” gaming
- Nintendo was—and still is—a predatory company that sought to monopolize video games
- The Nintendo “Seal of Quality” never guaranteed quality, and junk still arrived
- The Nintendo 64 was the peak of Nintendo arrogance, and it’s a good thing Sony put them in their place
- Nintendo is good now but only because the rest of the video game industry put a leash on them—but even now they’re litigious assholes
Now on to Atari:
- The original Atari stopped existing in 1976, when Nolan Bushnell sold Atari to Warner Communications
- Nolan Bushnell was right—Ray Kassar was an asshole who killed Atari because he disrespected his employees and nearly killed the brand because he overproduced Atari products
- Atari Corporation was not the “real” Atari because Atari was originally an arcade company, and they didn’t own Atari Games
- Even though Atari Corporation wasn’t the “real” Atari, that doesn’t matter because the Tramiel family kept the home division alive and made the excellent Atari ST
- Infrogrames was as much Atari as Atari Corporation, and they made better games than Atari Corporation
- Modern Atari is not Infogrames—that company is dead—but they’re a stealth takeover by Tommo
- Ziggurat Interactive is practically Atari, it’s owned by Atari’s CEO, and will likely merge with Atari—and by the way, they own the rights to 3DO
- Warner Bros. Games owns a lot of Atari IP, including Gauntlet and Paperboy, and they’re being bastards for not re-releasing those Atari games
Now for SEGA:
- SEGA was essentially an American company until Gulf+Western sold it off
- In fact, the best early SEGA arcade titles were made by Americans (Gremlin Industries)
- SEGA started to suck when SEGA of Japan started to disrespect SEGA of America
- SEGA of Japan only got better when that pachinko company bought it
- Modern SEGA is better than modern Nintendo because that pachinko company is using the video game industry to whitewash the fact they make most of their money from gambling
Now for Sony:
- Sony was right, Nintendo screwed them—and they were right for walking into the video game industry and destroying Nintendo’s dominance
- What’s always held Sony back was their addiction to weird proprietary formats
- Crash Bandicoot was a better 3D platformer than Super Mario 64
- The PlayStation controller was better than the N64 controller
- If Sony stopped trying to compete with Microsoft, they’d have better PlayStations
Now Microsoft:
- Even in the 90s, Microsoft published the best games of all time
- Microsoft Flight Simulator was always amazing
- Age of Empires was a better RTS than Command & Conquer
- Bill Gates was right, Xbox should have run Windows and played Windows games
- Microsoft could have been Valve but instead they let Valve eat their lunch
Now PC in general:
- A game is not better just because it lacks a console port
- Most games are better with keyboard and mouse, although gamepads could have been better if they had a trackpad
- Trip Hawkins was right about the 3DO model, that should have been how console gaming worked but he fucked up by creating a new platform entirely instead of piggybacking on PC—which already had the userbase—and consolizing that
- Along with better hardware, PC has always had the better and superior games library, and the inability to consolize PC gaming lead to decades of walled garden wankery
- Commodore had the right idea with the Amiga32 but no chunky graphics mode for Amigas meant it died too soon
- Subpar DOS emulation is what’s keeping people from realizing how good retro PC gaming actually is
- Half-Life is a better FPS than Goldeneye in every way, and you’re on crack if you try to argue otherwise
Finally:
- The need to “celebrate” everything retro is prevents people from thinking about video games in a critical manner, and keeps the world from respecting video games as an artform
- Having strong opinions about video games is ultimately a good thing because it means someone gives a damn
- There’s nothing fun or interesting about a hivemind consensus where everyone parrots the same talking points over and over again