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   Xeon² (izaya@social.shadowkat.net)'s status on Thursday, 05-Sep-2024 22:33:13 JST Xeon²

   in reply to

   • Len
   @len the groups in highschool were chill and generally interest-based and I think everyone thought they had it all worked out and didn't interfere with anyone else
   
   well, from my perspective, anyway. there was mild drama but I was insulated from it, I guess.
   
   the last few years have let me come up with a hypothesis of what kept going wrong with my relationships in highschool
   1. being an apparently attractive but quiet guy comes with expectations on how one will behave
   2. being a girl, actually, seems to have completely misaligned my expectations from everyone else's expectations
   3. being ace-aligned* made me approach the whole thing at right angles to everyone else anyway
   
   the one relationship I had that didn't violently implode ... turns out she's bi! go figure.
   
   but yeah my social life at school was sufficiently compartmentalised that I could just avoid my ex('s) for the year or so till stuff stopped being too weird
   
   * not enough data to be more specific but everyone else talks about this stuff very differently to my comprehension
   • Doughnut Lollipop 【記録係】:blobfoxgooglymlem: likes this.
   • Embed this notice
     Len (len@nyan.network)'s status on Thursday, 05-Sep-2024 22:33:15 JST Len

     in reply to
     @izaya me being asexual meant that I kinda caused collateral damage by existing, somehow, and we had more than one dude be a playboy with like... date all the girls as a goal?? But also good at making each individual feel like they'd be different.
     
     In college there were some clicky groups but none of them mattered unless you wanted them to matter, there was no ostracism or anything and enough down to earth people that those were an outlier. But also, permanent loner, maybe my radar on that is broken.
   • Embed this notice
     Xeon² (izaya@social.shadowkat.net)'s status on Thursday, 05-Sep-2024 22:33:16 JST Xeon²

     in reply to

     • Len
     @len even my relationships went ... not well, but they didn't cause much collateral damage.
   • Embed this notice
     Len (len@nyan.network)'s status on Thursday, 05-Sep-2024 22:33:17 JST Len

     in reply to
     @izaya I guess something from my highschool and college years is relationship drama?
     
     The rest was pretty uneventful but I was also a super loner so I sidestepped any friendgroup stuff.
   • Embed this notice
     Xeon² (izaya@social.shadowkat.net)'s status on Thursday, 05-Sep-2024 22:33:18 JST Xeon²
     maybe the reason that fedi is so often like highschool is because a significant number of the admins are only just older than highschool, and another significant number of them never moved on from highschool
     :akko_wink: