Conversation
Notices
-
Embed this notice
I have an autistic friend, not fake autistic like us like actually autistic, and I am really struggling. He’s an incredibly kind and thoughtful person but he’s also the most draining person to be around I’ve ever met because he can’t match the room at all and says the same few catchphrases over and over again. Idk what to do. (This is me coming to the fediverse for advice)
- BowserNoodle ☦️ likes this.
-
Embed this notice
@hidden How functional is he? If he can like hold a job and all that stuff, maybe he just needs to saturate himself in some type of culture that will be less annoying for everyone. Weightlifting is really good for this because the testosterone and bro culture will be good for him as long as he doesn't get into bodybuilding and the homosexuality involved in parts of that.
-
Embed this notice
@Jonaschuzzlewit @hidden Point was I spent years fixing myself with no small amount of encouragement from a belligerent fat woman. Until I was about half way through my 20s I was a fucking weirdo. It's not impossible for someone who is self aware or made self aware to change course.
It's easier said than done and I might be an exception in terms of sheer retarded willpower but I don't think it's impossible for any autist to better themselves socially.
I do still have moments when I blurt out really; really rude shit. Very mean sounding empirical observations about people right to their face but I'm aware of what I've said when I say it, then apologize, and try to make it clear that it happens and that I'm an asshole. Practically altered my entire psychology to get where I am now. Always fine tuning 'being human'.
But yeah. They have to want to 'fix' themselves. They have to see for them self that those quirks are a problem for the people around them and introspect on it.
-
Embed this notice
@Eiswald @Jonaschuzzlewit @hidden This is great advice honestly. I know a guy who is possibly autistic and was raised by like his grandma or something, and he was similarly emotionally taxing but very kind and intelligent. I hung out with him a few times and just asked him questions about himself, so he'd open up a bit about what he was wanting in his life. Turns out he did want to fix some things but he didn't know where to start. I gave him some good personalized advice using the sandwich technique— compliment-criticism-compliment— so that he knew it was coming from a place of love/friendship rather than coming across as me being a dick. He's so much more chill and has seriously improved his life in the last decade.
-
Embed this notice
@hidden Tell him to lurk more. I learned to curve my weird social tendencies by shutting the fuck up.
-
Embed this notice
Learn to enjoy them as they are. One of my best friend is and when I try to fix I get frustrated.
Best is to enjoy them for being different
-
Embed this notice
@BowsacNoodle @hidden if it becomes a special interest the discovery of bodybuilding and the gay aspect of it is inevitable. always a gamble what you suggest to us, we latch onto things hard sometimes and hyperfixate over them.
-
Embed this notice
@mentallyill @hidden That's why fitness is so good. Even bodybuilding with all the bro science and nuance and inevitable body dysmorphia can keep someone autistically focused on fixing their perceived inadequate areas without becoming gay.
-
Embed this notice
@BowsacNoodle @Eiswald @Jonaschuzzlewit @hidden maybe getting him into reading human emotions as a hobby or something like that. Is there any good role model he could mimic? Like some detective so he can feel what he's doing is cool (it is, btw)
-
Embed this notice
@MechaSilvio @Eiswald @Jonaschuzzlewit @hidden Get him hooked on Columbo
-
Embed this notice
@hidden give him some head, it might fix him up.
?Hidden?
BowserNoodle ☦️
Wrath
Jonaschuzzlewit
Kirino! 🍀
Berlusconi Fever :sonnenrad:
Avatar of Chaos
All GNU social JP content and data are available under the