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Black Rifle Coffee has a chain around a place I was visiting. As a coffee snob who is not immediately judgemental of a coffee chain's politics, I went and purchased a cup.
Those of you who clicked the images already see where this post is going, but I swear that the details are interesting!
I purchased a cup of the "Tactisquatch" coffee - a Honduran coffee - as a pour over. The company prides itself in brewing this using a Chemex. I watched the barista do their job, and they did not make any obvious errors. The people working immediately behind the counter seem to be doing their job as well as an average barista at a solid coffee house would.
The first tasting note I observed - and by far the most dominant one - was best described as the taste of ash. Hard carbon was obviously the primary taste, and there is no escaping it. The beans were vastly over roasted.
If the hero of the story had a less refined palate, the story would end here. Burnt beans, just as bad as Starcucks. However, CMD is a novice connoisseur, and has the ability to taste two or three tasting notes in a cup of coffee (a true connoisseur, of course, can often taste four or more).
This is where the story gets interesting. The second tasting note - subtle, but certainly present - was a phenolic taste. I oscillate between whether I want to describe it as "medicinal" or "similar to band-aids," but it was certainly one of the two and not both. Regardless, what is interesting is that a defect that can cause this is mold. It does have other causes, so I am not confident in what I am about to claim.
This is not a hard accusation, but based on the above I *suspect* that this particular batch had been moldy and the roasters attempted to cover it up by over-roasting it. This is corroborated by the impact it had on my intestines later that night - I fell slightly ill from the coffee - but none of this is hard evidence regardless.
There was a third tasting note - I could not pin it down, but it was absolutely of some stone fruit - but I do want to note its presence regardless. One might point to this as evidence that the beans themselves started out as something that might have been a quality product before it molded over, but I cannot know that for sure.
This was the only cup of coffee that I have ever consumed that made me sick of its own fault. It is also the only cup of coffee I have had since adulthood which had a detectable medicinal taste.
It was the worst cup of coffee I have ever consumed.
This is not a political statement of any kind.
Please do not consume this.
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- Mer's pizza Mer's world :blobcatgooglytrash: and ✙ dcc :pedomustdie: :phear_slackware: like this.
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@Tony @ceo_of_monoeye_dating >black rifle
My god
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I'm disappointed, I was considering buying a bag of black rifle the other day, but I was a little sussed out.
I'm a coffee snob too but I also like Joe Rogan and he talks about this stuff constantly so I was hoping it would be good.
That being said, I still need to try it for myself because I'm curious
Can't be worse than McDonalds coffee...
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@Tony @ceo_of_monoeye_dating On a cofe note i really like the dunkin beans, drinking cofe rn in fact :pepe_cofe:
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@Tony @ceo_of_monoeye_dating I'm talking about the beans, and when they do make the cofe it is bitter?
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Dunkin' is okay, but to me it lacks the bitterness or the "bite?".
I like caribou as far as chain coffees. Starbucks always seems to burn their beans
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@theorytoe @ceo_of_monoeye_dating @Tony >he doesn't drink both
:pepe_cofe_2:
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@Tony @dcc @ceo_of_monoeye_dating
cofe gang falls
gween tea gang rise up
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I like bitter coffee, but Starbucks burns it.
Make a pot at home and leave it on the heater for like an hour and you'll know what I mean. I think they do it so all the beans taste the same across all the stores.
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@Tony @ceo_of_monoeye_dating >leave it on the heater
My coffee maker does not have one and it keeps it warm for 4-5 hours lol. But yes i know the burnt flavor.
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@Tony >Can't be worse than McDonalds coffee...
I reiterate. This was *the* worst cup of coffee I have consumed. This includes the likes of McDonalds/Folgers. Such coffee is bitter and it is poor, but it only has one core "badness" to it.
This cup of coffee had at least two severe faults, one of which I suspect was introduced on purpose to cover up the second. It was an affront to decency, I must again urge you to not consume this.
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@ceo_of_monoeye_dating @Tony @koropokkur Gas station coffee in a busy area has one thing going for it, which is that it's almost always very fresh. I'm talking 20 tops at some of the busier places. They'll usually use prepackaged stuff, but sometimes you can luck out and get a local place that has a local roaster connection. It's almost always some corporate supply chain proportioned stale bag though.
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@koropokkur @Tony Fine, I have never consumed gas station coffee. I have an absolute low bar, and apparently this was it! 🤷
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youd think gas station coffee on american hwys would be top notch, but no...
its fucking rotgut swill that will give you the shits and make your face breakout in an oily mess.
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or an employee who takes pride in his job and makes a decent brew. yeah, most are just those braun units where they toss in a bag and let it run. never clean the pots or the tubes with vinegar so have nasty oils and other scale ruining the flavor.
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@koropokkur @ceo_of_monoeye_dating @Tony They get so dang acidic in those from the rancid oil sludge. I worked at a place that had one for a brief period and there was a baked on layer of oil on the tube. Like it may has well have had a nonstick coating, except it was oils from coffee.
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@BowsacNoodle @Tony @koropokkur Meh. I am not an addict, and if the only product around is swill then I will simply go without.
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@ceo_of_monoeye_dating @Tony @koropokkur >not addicted to caffeine
must be nice! (for real, happy for you).
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@BowsacNoodle @ceo_of_monoeye_dating @Tony @koropokkur You can't exactly be addicted to caffeine, its not like caffeine is a bad thing either.
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@BowsacNoodle @Tony @koropokkur I am actually somewhat sensitive to caffeine. I attempt to limit myself to the equivalent of 4 shots of espresso a day, and being aware of this makes you attempt to be more discerning. The cost of drinking a poor cup of coffee becomes a lost opportunity to drink something better.
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it’s bad for like a day and even then, just have like half a cup for a day or two and you literally have no problems.
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@dcc @Tony @koropokkur @BowsacNoodle Caffeine withdrawal is real, but it's the easiest addiction to break.
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@dcc @ceo_of_monoeye_dating @Tony @koropokkur I get foggy feeling without it. Kind of sucks. It's gotten better as I've gotten older, but I was a consistent half pot of coffee+ per day in college.
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when you have 300 miles to drive and its 6pm, the swill is swilled
CEO of Monoeye Dating
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koropokkur
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