Notices by ity [unit X-69] (ity@estradiol.city)

@meadow @hellomiakoda

As you have not granted mastodon.social rights over your content by signing up to them, they do not have a license to redistribute your content - in fact you could sue them to the ground with GDPR if they would refuse to delete content (which is the main difference - revocability), and the terms of service of the server you are on dictate what they can or cannot do. In fact technically speaking it's questionable whether mastodon.social is legally allowed to redistribute your content as the user of another instance to their own users, but that is a separate issue entirely

You are misinterpreting the issue entirely, not only Mastodon's stance but also how IP law and the fediverse work

Obviously, I am not a lawyer, but I am an open source dev that handled IP things on a best effort basis.

I'd like to share with fedi that the official hosting place for the RISC-V spec PDFs is Google Drive.

No further comment necessary.

@hellomiakoda Trying to find logic in democracy is a fool's errand

It's just cuz the politicians thought it'd get them more votes if they did that and thus more money, as everything in this country. The general populace is ableistic, so it probably worked.

@hellomiakoda I know myself that I am not handling things at all, but I am essentially backed into a corner, idk what to do. It's not like I can access medication I need to help me deal with ADHD, and in this country it's illegal for folks that have certain disabilities to drive a car (eg. Autism. Amazing), which I only barely managed to bypass.

@hellomiakoda Oh my god I so wish I had a reliable caretaker, I'd kill for having someone to do that for me that would actually be capable of understanding things :neofox_sob:

@hellomiakoda Also the need of me to ask a family member to do cleaning meshes really badly with the trauma I have of being treated as lesser by ageists

@hellomiakoda The funny thing is that yea, I agree. I know it rationally. But I still get anxiety from using the non-gendered bathroom, because my internalized ableism applies to me and me alone - towards everyone else, the internalized ableism does not apply x3

@hellomiakoda Yeaa... At least nowadays my mom is trying to be better. Somewhat. After I guilt tripped her by explaining to her exactly how much trauma her abuse caused me + by blackmailing her by threatening her to sabotage something she wants me to do that I don't actually need to do but I agree is useful. I wish I didn't have to resort to that, but hey, I learned it from her, she is the most manipulative person I have ever met (my earliest memory of her is her lying to me when I was 5 to take me earlier from an abusive place she placed me in every day), and it's not like I actually manipulate anyone else anyway.

@hellomiakoda Yeaa... This meshes so badly with my executive dysfunction. I am incapable of cleaning properly, so I need a family member to do the cleaning, but said family member does not understand what do not move my shit means, and so my options are to either supervise them their entire time cleaning, or to just deal with having a meltdown over not finding my meds etc, or to live in a dirty flat x3 And they also do not understand what that part does not need cleaning means, so I am stuck watching them clean 3 hours in a really inefficient way.

The only time that changes is when I manage to momentarily suppress one of the things that cause me to be dysfunctional, then I get the energy to clean. That only ever happens with external help though. Usually when someone I am looking forward to visits my place.

I hate living in an unclean place, where there's shit all over the place, but I don't have the energy to fix it...

@hellomiakoda That sounds awful, mew /genuine

I hate public restrooms for so many reasons... Tho currently for me the most awful is smell. I bought a gas mask now tho. The second is people. And it's the worst where the thing doesn't have a lock... Also gendered bathrooms are awful. Going in the male bathrooms gives me gender dysphoria, but I am masc-presenting still due to lack of HRT so I'd probably be screamed at if I went into the female bathroom. And I am too scared to go to the ungendered wheelchair bathrooms, idk, worried they'll yell at me for taking the bathroom for what if someone in a wheelchair came...

@hellomiakoda That is possible

I wonder if this relates to how badly I freak out when a family member visits my flat and moves my things that I NEED (like meds) somewhere I can't find them

I usually have a full-on breakdown - I used to get breakdowns often where I threw things when someone violated my boundaries, nowadays the only time that that happens is when I find that someone moved my stuff. It makes me cry and scream... It makes me feel unsafe in my own home x3 Nowhere to run...

@hellomiakoda OH, oh, oh I am so sorry, that sounds so awful /genuine

offers hugs, unsure if okay

@hellomiakoda Yea I had a similar thing, though interestingly it was only triggered by strangers, I think? I managed to somehow completely dissociate it away. Like it's still there, I still dislike it, but I no longer freak out, and can mostly just make my brain not notice it.

Being bullied by everyone including my parents over this really did a number on me, but at least it makes functioning easier, ig.

@hellomiakoda My brain decided that the number 6 is not to be for this specific thing, best I can do is 5 or 10 at this specific moment (then lose track of if I flipped it the correct number of times if it's 10 and spend the rest of the day being restless over it so 5 would be preferable, though my brain will probably find a way to convince itself that we failed at counting that too)

Having dysgraphia makes writing centered *really* hard, can I use a stamp instead :neobot_pleading:

@hellomiakoda Oh?

@hellomiakoda I used to have a thing where I refused to sit on chairs that a stranger sat on if the chair was supposed to be "mine", and I slapped anyone touching my desk in school. I learned to just dissociate it away because every single teacher bullied me over it.

@hellomiakoda Ah interesting, I do not have any gernophobia stuff. I do have the thing of having to match deodorant (unless I dissociate while applying it and try to not think about it, then I can usually not match it)

I dislike wearing non-matching socks but I do not obsess over it, though it does make me very uncomfortable, and I would probably not go outside with unmatching socks because I'd be too uncomfortable to focus on social situations, unless I'd manage to dissociate it

I am okay with shoelaces touching the ground, and my glasses are a scratched mess that are impossible to clean. I cannot properly see over it and that stresses me out a lot but I cannot really do anything about it so I just dissociate it away.

Wait do I just have regular OCD that I dissociate away so badly I convinced myself I don't have it

@hellomiakoda
> TV volume must be an even number OR a multiple of 5. (My sis has this trait, but not enough traits to qualify.

Wait I thought everyone had that- Yes same here.

> I sometimes get stuck in loops - like checking the door lock, or that the stove is off, many many times.

Yeaa that matches what I described I think ? Sorta

Hmm guess I have OCD too then? Like what you described also more or less matches me, though my tolerance of asymmetry has improved, it used to be much worse

@hellomiakoda To be specific there's a lot of irrational stuff I do that I have to do or I feel severe restlessness
Stuff like checking if the door is locked before going to sleep 10 (not exact number, it's usually around 3-4 times) times, or making sure I save images I am sent even if I will never look at them again in my life (FOMO turned obsessive, combined with it being a trauma trigger, lmao), and of course the classic thing of wanting to do (some) things some select number amount of times or being restless. (Mostly touching things but it's pretty random)

@hellomiakoda I match some of the diagnosis criteria but idk if I am allowed to say I have it lmao