Notices by SwiftOnSecurity (swiftonsecurity@infosec.exchange)

The pupils of the programmer are black not because they see the same spectrum of light as you, but because it is the entrance to an infinity of lies. How long have you been here? Minutes? Centuries? This insufferable progress bar is not abstraction. It is the embodiment of Hell.

Nothing better than getting a meatspin after a long day.

If you ever see a Bentley or Porsche stolen from someone's driveway you know that sad motherfucker British

There was a time computer accessory design was "fuck it we ball"

Forgive my dismissive attitude towards people who think they will change the world on their first go 'round, with plea and petition. Because I was exactly the same. I wanted to fix the world, my world at least. And I strived. But I didn't know how. And I sat in that despair. I sat in it for years.

Beauty is the natural procedure, beauty is the interlock. Where you have made something that in natural states resists being ugly. You will make compromises; be prepared. The world is not beckon to your aesthetic call. But it's something I've found true operating at the highest levels of execution.

Perhaps you'd think farcical in comparison, but I always felt a fervent ownership and want to protect people and information. And I saw glaring failure, basic mistakes. And I sat in that, wondering why nobody cared. Why didn't they care like I did. And you know what that got me. It got me nothing.

Something ingrained, that I realize now others do not have, is knowing the solution to failure is offering a better solution. I have tried shame I have endured compliance. I ground this axe years. You need the market to decide you've won. I sold modern policy baselines to fix user experience. I won.

As junior staff, you will misunderstand engineering and safety as in conflict. But they're not. You've simply approached the problem too late. Safe designs can be even more elegant. They can add complexity, but which eliminates absurdity and indeterminacy. You have to understand beauty first.

In the chaos of the un-designed, with understanding of possibility under an architect, you should be able to find optimization through vision. My job is Security Engineer, but my job is not Security. It's producing a better solution that is secure. Which is better because it simply is better.

I have lived as the vindictive policymaker. I was that person. Earnestly striving to make things better, vacillating between rage and despair. Completely morally just in context, but wholly empty in solution durable. I have been the emotions. And it produced nothing. Only being better mattered.

hrrgnh colonel im trying to sneak around this network but im dummy thicc and the clap from my cyber cheeks keeps alerting the EDR

You ever be working and remember the British underground has been soaking in heat from the trains for a century and it's starting to cook them alive

Scotland has detected no cases of cervical cancer in women born between 1988-1996 who were fully vaccinated against HPV between the ages of 12 and 13.

HPV causes multiple types of cancer in men as well. Australia saw similar results on their vaccination campaign. You can get the HPV vaccine up to 45 now, and it helps even if you already have HPV.
https://www.statnews.com/2024/01/25/hpv-vaccine-prevent-cervical-cancer-cervarix-gardasil-study/

"You sick fuck, that Windows update hadn't even finished deploying to the pilot group before you approved it for production."

The early speculation this morning

Shout out to my friends in the pager security community, they are going THROUGH IT right now 🫣

"I'm having problems so I downloaded a registry cleaner"

As I've said before, Taylor Swift may be the cultural lynchpin for addressing abusive AI imitation and I think this was her personal opening salvo.

Interesting example of comprehensive threat modeling: Under security delay safety feature in iOS, even with phone password you cannot add an email account capable of wiping the device.
(Muggers are threatening to kill if you don't give your passcode too.)