GNU social JP
  • FAQ
  • Login
GNU social JPは日本のGNU socialサーバーです。
Usage/ToS/admin/test/Pleroma FE
  • Public

    • Public
    • Network
    • Groups
    • Featured
    • Popular
    • People

Notices by Fesshole 🧻 (fesshole@mastodon.social), page 2

  1. Embed this notice
    Fesshole 🧻 (fesshole@mastodon.social)'s status on Monday, 21-Jul-2025 03:33:23 JST Fesshole 🧻 Fesshole 🧻

    Me and three mates send each other voice messages recording our farts and rate them out of ten, walking dog today and decided to record a decent brew, woman came round corner and clocked me with phone to my arse.

    In conversation a day ago from mastodon.social permalink
  2. Embed this notice
    Fesshole 🧻 (fesshole@mastodon.social)'s status on Monday, 21-Jul-2025 02:21:09 JST Fesshole 🧻 Fesshole 🧻

    When I was a kid, a pair of dolphins saved my life, but my parents never believed me. On holiday in Australia. I was snorkelling in the ocean & realised too late that a shark was coming towards me. Suddenly, two dolphins rammed the shark, giving me time to swim back to the boat.

    In conversation a day ago from mastodon.social permalink
  3. Embed this notice
    Fesshole 🧻 (fesshole@mastodon.social)'s status on Monday, 21-Jul-2025 01:41:41 JST Fesshole 🧻 Fesshole 🧻

    I play UNO with my dog. Obviously I play her cards for her. She still wins about 92% of the time.

    In conversation a day ago from mastodon.social permalink
  4. Embed this notice
    Fesshole 🧻 (fesshole@mastodon.social)'s status on Monday, 21-Jul-2025 00:20:09 JST Fesshole 🧻 Fesshole 🧻

    Just taken a mint condition, high-quality 1080p TV to the recycling centre because we literally couldn't give it away. Future historians will write about stuff like this.

    In conversation a day ago from mastodon.social permalink
  5. Embed this notice
    Fesshole 🧻 (fesshole@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 20-Jul-2025 23:21:20 JST Fesshole 🧻 Fesshole 🧻

    Even if there are empty seats in a train carriage, if you have your feet up on a seat, I'm sitting there whether you agree to move without fuss or not. I take great delight in this and I'm sure it amuses other people too.

    In conversation a day ago from mastodon.social permalink
  6. Embed this notice
    Fesshole 🧻 (fesshole@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 20-Jul-2025 22:24:54 JST Fesshole 🧻 Fesshole 🧻

    Husband refuses to do any financial admin: booking plane tickets or hotels, grocery deliveries, travel insurance, any online purchases. So I do it all via a cashback app and keep that cash for myself. Finder's fee, I think.

    In conversation a day ago from mastodon.social permalink
  7. Embed this notice
    Fesshole 🧻 (fesshole@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 20-Jul-2025 21:28:59 JST Fesshole 🧻 Fesshole 🧻

    I lost my sight two years ago. Mostly I'm okay with being blind. I've adapted well. I am very independent and have found new ways to "see" the world. But there's four things I miss seeing more than anything. My three children's faces. And the stars at night.

    In conversation a day ago from mastodon.social permalink
  8. Embed this notice
    Fesshole 🧻 (fesshole@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 20-Jul-2025 20:55:18 JST Fesshole 🧻 Fesshole 🧻

    I always encourage my wife to watch the most mundane looking show on her watch list. When she inevitably falls asleep, I slip out to the next room and play guitar instead.

    In conversation a day ago from mastodon.social permalink
  9. Embed this notice
    Fesshole 🧻 (fesshole@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 20-Jul-2025 19:20:10 JST Fesshole 🧻 Fesshole 🧻

    I have a small tech business with a mate. Years ago we bought loads of .com names in the hope one of them, one day, would be worth £££. He phoned me excitedly the other day to say we've been offered 80k for one of them. How do I tell him I forgot to renew it 2 years ago.

    In conversation 2 days ago from mastodon.social permalink
  10. Embed this notice
    Fesshole 🧻 (fesshole@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 20-Jul-2025 18:21:52 JST Fesshole 🧻 Fesshole 🧻

    The boringest fess: I often iron things that don't need it simply to extend my alone time with the iron and watching 90s Star Trek.

    In conversation 2 days ago from mastodon.social permalink
  11. Embed this notice
    Fesshole 🧻 (fesshole@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 20-Jul-2025 17:30:50 JST Fesshole 🧻 Fesshole 🧻

    Shortest ever date was when I met someone at Euston, after work, back in the 1990s. We confirmed names, then he said: "thanks for being here but no thanks." He turned around and left. On balance, it was better than wasting a whole evening.

    In conversation 2 days ago from mastodon.social permalink
  12. Embed this notice
    Fesshole 🧻 (fesshole@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 20-Jul-2025 16:00:24 JST Fesshole 🧻 Fesshole 🧻

    Fesshole is looking for your confession. Submit yours via our form: https://bit.ly/addfess

    In conversation 2 days ago from mastodon.social permalink

    Attachments

    1. Domain not in remote thumbnail source whitelist: lh4.googleusercontent.com
      Fesshole - Anonymous Confessions
      Submitting a confession to Fesshole gives Fesshole permission to publish it. Duh. Also we DO NOT store your email - that asterisk saying 'required' is to stop people submitting blank confessions.
  13. Embed this notice
    Fesshole 🧻 (fesshole@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 20-Jul-2025 07:29:20 JST Fesshole 🧻 Fesshole 🧻

    I really don't want to be with my girlfriend anymore but stay with her cos I love going for a pint with her dad and I don't want that to stop.

    In conversation 2 days ago from mastodon.social permalink
  14. Embed this notice
    Fesshole 🧻 (fesshole@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 20-Jul-2025 06:21:48 JST Fesshole 🧻 Fesshole 🧻

    Had a job which involved a 50-mile drive home in the early hours. Used to shadow people on the motorway. They sped up, I sped up. They slowed down, I slowed down. One time I followed a guy 40+ miles till he turned off the street before mine. He waved goodbye to me.

    In conversation 2 days ago from mastodon.social permalink
  15. Embed this notice
    Fesshole 🧻 (fesshole@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 20-Jul-2025 05:21:00 JST Fesshole 🧻 Fesshole 🧻

    My gym has one of those tube entry systems, one side opens, you step in, then it closes around you before front opens to let you out
    I always try to time fart before I step out, leaving the aroma trapped inside for the next person to enter

    In conversation 2 days ago from mastodon.social permalink
  16. Embed this notice
    Fesshole 🧻 (fesshole@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 20-Jul-2025 04:22:11 JST Fesshole 🧻 Fesshole 🧻

    I'm severely Lactose Intolerant, if my wife or kids wants me to do something and I really can't be arsed I drink a glass of milk and have the shits for about two hours, the amount of times I've gotten out of going to the in-laws is quite a feat.

    In conversation 2 days ago from mastodon.social permalink
  17. Embed this notice
    Fesshole 🧻 (fesshole@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 20-Jul-2025 03:20:46 JST Fesshole 🧻 Fesshole 🧻

    I'm living proof that some people need a good smack to humble them. When I was a teen, I thought I was a hard man. That is until I got beat up, by a girl, in front of everyone. Changed my ways almost overnight. Never truly lived it down.

    In conversation 2 days ago from mastodon.social permalink
  18. Embed this notice
    Fesshole 🧻 (fesshole@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 20-Jul-2025 03:20:46 JST Fesshole 🧻 Fesshole 🧻

    Please tell your friends to follow Fesshole so we can tick over to the 10k followers number and stop our admin's left eye twitching that it's nearly there

    (Also the more followers here the better really, as rows in the comments makes Fesshole come alive)

    In conversation 2 days ago from mastodon.social permalink

    Attachments


    1. https://files.mastodon.social/media_attachments/files/114/881/241/721/531/847/original/6549140953b5b374.png
  19. Embed this notice
    Fesshole 🧻 (fesshole@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 20-Jul-2025 02:21:45 JST Fesshole 🧻 Fesshole 🧻

    Landlord's wife barred access to the apartment building's nice little backyard for a veggie garden. Been throwing birdseed and peanuts into it from the window so the animals are encouraged to rip it up. I've never seen so much as a tomato from that garden in my years being here.

    In conversation 2 days ago from mastodon.social permalink
  20. Embed this notice
    Fesshole 🧻 (fesshole@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 20-Jul-2025 01:20:10 JST Fesshole 🧻 Fesshole 🧻

    TV doctor & IVF pioneer, Professor Robert Winston, is responsible for adversely affecting my sex life. Years ago, my wife and I were watching one of his programmes when he stated "sperm is 30 days old when ejaculated". After that, she stopped performing a certain act.

    In conversation 3 days ago from mastodon.social permalink
  • After
  • Before

User actions

    Fesshole 🧻

    Fesshole 🧻

    Official Fesshole account on Mastodon* Add your confession http://bit.ly/fessholeform * Buy NEW book: https://amzn.to/40ySjVn* Frequently asked questions https://bit.ly/fessholefaq* Fesshole is a project by robmanuel of b3ta.

    Tags
    • (None)

    Following 0

      Followers 1

      • GNU Too

      Groups 0

        Statistics

        User ID
        238139
        Member since
        26 Jan 2024
        Notices
        1692
        Daily average
        3

        Feeds

        • Atom
        • Help
        • About
        • FAQ
        • TOS
        • Privacy
        • Source
        • Version
        • Contact

        GNU social JP is a social network, courtesy of GNU social JP管理人. It runs on GNU social, version 2.0.2-dev, available under the GNU Affero General Public License.

        Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 All GNU social JP content and data are available under the Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 license.

        Embed this notice