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Sarah's suicide changed my priorities.
I don't want to spend my energy trying to fix friendships that hurt me. I'd rather spend it being the best friend I can be for those who do know me well and love me. They deserve all my spoons. The others can have the leftovers.
I don't want to lose someone who cares about me and think I could have spent more time or energy on them, that I wasted it on those who I can't even figure out why they call themselves my friend.