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i actually find it that it hurts quite a bit when people are upset at me, whichever the reason! i think it feels similarly to how others describe "rejection sensitive dysphoria"

i don't really have much of a choice; being known by as many others as i am makes it an inevitability that someone, somewhere, will be upset at me

facing this, i had to learn how to tolerate it, and also decided that minimizing it above all else is a really bad strategy for existence