@lookitmychicken Yeah, I think a lot of people are like that, more likely to let things slide when it just affects themselves but ready to throw hands if it affects someone they care about.
I wonder sometimes if that might be a useful angle to take when trying to get people to be more polite to each other online (and offline). Instead of trying the empathy angle of "If you'd be upset to have this said/done to you, don't say/do it to others" go with "If you'd get mad about someone saying/doing this to your bestie, don't say/do it to someone else". I think at least some people would stop and think about their words and actions more if they framed them that way. I don't know if it would make a real difference though.