@Yujiri You just seem to be taking things very seriously, and coming from me that's a statement; I take everything way too seriously. There's a wealth of history behind every complaint you bring up, and each of these examples you describe may be good at federating within a very specific domain but only one of them actually deserves to be compared in federation to fedi, and that's email -- Matrix isn't federated so long as more than 51% of people have their homeserver set to matrix.org, XMPP was crippled by Google for years and ruined it for people who used it before Google Talk (for similar reasons to what you're bringing up, too), and Lemmy is ActivityPub as well, just merely narrowed in scope.

Pleroma, Masto, Misskey, Honk, Revolver, every one of these does something very different -- they attempt to communicate as widely as possible rather than tackling an existing narrow scope. Each of them has a different philosophy and a different history, and though one might support features that another might not (take the Misskey meme for example), fedi has only really just, in the last year or so, gotten out of the orbit of Twitter and became truly its own thing. Where we are now is the arguing about features phase of growth, and in the end not everyone will agree. Mastodon will always be an albatross around the neck of the fediverse, both weighing it down but also being the same damn bird that led us to the trade winds in the first place. This isn't a place where any one implementation will become the living standard, because many of the hackers around these parts actively despise the state of standards like Unicode, and would rather implement an MRF to reject emoji reacts outright -- and honestly I appreciate that the network is so diverse with ideas of what federation could be.

But right now? There are a lot of discussions left to be had, a lot of new implementations and forks left to be finished, before we can really see what is best for the network that we have, warts and all.