Those of you who are familiar with our ongoing series on patents will probably instinctively recoil and sigh "oh gosh, it's the most overengineered douche of all. 1800s concept with 1999 technology".
We are pleased to inform you that just this once it's not a douche. Yes, it's designed to spray water at the genital area, but this bad boy is in fact designed specifically with the purpose of masturbation in mind.