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But all of that makes everything I'm watching right now fill me up with a million emotions. It's great to see success. It's frightening to think that being too successful might make you a target.

There's another thing I haven't said, I think: I almost didn't transition because I *knew* I'm a prominent trans engineer, and I know what happens to prominent trans engineers. Fucked up, right?

And like, I guess it's just *weird* to see this thing I've poured myself into, killed myself over, that I've never stopped trying to figure out how to figure out how to get to the next phase, suddenly get all this attention. ESPECIALLY BECAUSE A RICH DUDE GOT UPSET AT A BAD JOKE SITE GETTING KICKED OFF FOR MAKING A TRANSPHOBIC JOKE

You wanna hear a joke? That a bunch of people who are claiming they're all for "freedom of speech" are kissing the feet of *centralization* now that it's at the end of a despot who might get away with letting them say racist, sexist, queerphobic bullshit.

Just watching all this, it's all too real. It's all too personal. It's hard to look away from.