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@paul I think you could get away with midnight commander instead of midnight train on artistic license, but i agree that dog and momma are way harder to solve.

You might try to look up some dns records like so: https://www.linode.com/docs/guides/use-dog-linux-dns-client/
to get the dog, but still not a good solution because it's not well known.

Maybe a process didn't respond to the one that spawned it, thus getting mom in? Disappointed in her son, might fit.