>"what my body wants to be"
>"that causes my heart and soul agony. Should I let them suffer and deny them their truth"

Why do you speak of your body, heart, and soul as if they're all separate entities outside of yourself? From the sounds of it, you don't "know your heart" nearly as well as you think you do. If you did, you wouldn't refer to it in the third person.

You are not a whole person. Your sense of self is fractured. Your heart hurts, and your soul thirsts for purpose. But in your fractured state your interpretations of what your heart and soul want are misguided. You cannot hope to sate either of them unless you are one with them. And in your misguided attempts to heal your soul you seek to change your body.

This is not the way. Hopefully you realize that before it's too late to turn back.