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For real though #askfedi

Serious question:
If I post some hot illustration or some photo of an attractive thirst trap OnlyFans woman trying to attract new customers,

Beyond the obligatory CW,
How the _fuck_ do I alt text that?

I'm likely overthinking it, but yo, is writing

"chubby curvy woman wearing a low-cut sweater and skirt smiles at the camera. Her breasts are bigger than her head"

actually useful to anyone?

how about "thicc curvy model wearing revealing clothes?"