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- Embed this notice@givenup @mischievoustomato @veff @WashedOutGundamPilot You can make it your business to know people, and that is the only way to succeed economically, romantically, and (of course) socially. Humans are social animals. It's harder now because the institutions that used to shunt kind of nerdy but capable guys into friends and social opportunities are gone or subverted now, but there was never a society where you took the SAT, got a good score, and were immediately handed a wife and a high-paying job.
Think about it from her perspective. She's effectively gambling her most valuable asset on you being neither a flake that will use and discard her nor some kind of weirdo that will drop out of work to troon out and demand she support your fetish. A single mistake leaves her alone at 30 with very little of value to her name. Preselection by friends and family is the only way.