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The progressive church deals with this situation ALL THE TIME.

And certainly, there can be something other than "us," "them," and a demilitarized zone in between. It is possible with some donors and in some moments to do some "donor education," and to help people understand that giving really does ask a certain selflessness; it's faith-forward toward the future.

This kind of transformative dialogue requires openness and skin in the game, though. Sometimes it's just not there.

"No" is love.