The question you have to ask yourself is death while you're still alive better than psychosis. When you are functional enough I highly recommend a book called, "A Beautiful Mind" by Sylvia Nasar. It documents the mental journey of John Nash, a brilliant mathematicians struggle with psychosis. He learned to recognize the delusions and hallucinations and get them under control without drugs, went on to win the Nobel prize for his mathematical modeling and understanding of economics. There are a handful of psychiatrists that have come to at least a partial understanding of the methods he developed individually and have had at least partial success at helping patients apply them. With Nash, his mathematical brilliance went away when under the influence of anti-psychotics and hence he had a strong motivation for finding another way.