@anarchopunk_girl Oh God how I wish I could be there with a large pizza, a 6er of their favorite beer and all the hugs and ears till the birds start chirping, like god damn you nailed it.
And yeah, I was was big time into online communities for my interests and to pick up new ones and learn about things by proxy and vicariousness, but I came to realize a lot of the gaming ones reflected back associations I really didn't like put upon me.
Gamergate, even though I was on the edges of it simply being a gamer on forums, really had me question whether it was good and wise to devote so much of my free time to gaming and socializing around gaming even as I was a noxious asshole myself. Like, these are my associates, these fucking pricks, really, well I refuse! I got kicked off plenty of forums for being a handful but that was like a shot ringing out in the night and I didnt want that for me.
And the whole thing that even started it for me in 2012 was getting the boot from a really good forum that had tons of flesh and blood playmates in my area who I foolishly and blithely cut myself off from because I just couldn't resist tweaking people and playing around with the rules.
Lol, sheesh, I could just talk and talk about this all day...but to kinda wrap the thought up
At this point after fleshing some of this out with you, I realize that a lot of why I spit at being Very Online despite being Very Online, is one part my own limits with being Very Online in self identity and connecting, one part feeling stuck knowing I don't absolutely have to be, one part there being a lack of levity of thought online where you can taste the flavor of site the original thought emanated from and why it is so utterly self confident even in complete derangement...and these are supposta be my folks or something. Its not the other people in the boat with me in their similar but variety of ways, its the quality of the trip and how there is only the boat sometimes for better or worse.